New Missile Shield SolutionFebruary 25th, 2005 at 3:11 pm by Preston Taylor Holmes
Those filthy Canucks north of the border have come out and said that they want no part of the U.S. missile defense program.
Gasp! An international arms race!?!? Egad! Been there, won that.
I have a solution for those faux-Frenchies in Moosehead land – and an improvement to our country’s own strategic defense shield. It’s called the Super Missile Misdirection Magnet.
I haven’t completed the scientific, or effectiveness, portion of the system’s development, but I have completed the initial design. This supermagnet will simply re-direct all incoming missiles towards Canadian territories. As pictured in this helpful diagram:
I’ve already submitted the system to my high-level government contacts, so stand by for news in the mainstream press about this new groundbreaking system. For the time being, we’ll just keep it between you and me.