Fingertip Friday!
May 13th, 2005 at 3:39 pm by Preston Taylor HolmesA few quick news/blog bites. Not that you need them, dear readers, because I assume all of you are always on top of the news. This is why I don’t constantly post every damn story that comes down the pike. Am I giving you too much credit? Do you need to be spoon fed and blockquoted? I don’t think so, but please let me know if you’d like more of that crap here (no offense to those blogs who do such things…).
First, they found the original owner of the fingertip with which crazy hag Anna Ayala tried to blackmail Wendy’s. It seems that the fingertip originally belonged to a friend of her husband who lost it in an industrial accident. Anna’s husband was also recently arrested on charges of identity theft – those two scumbags are a match made in heaven.
Next, it appears that the case against Marine Corps 2nd Lt. Ilario Pantano is falling apart. The primary witness can’t seem to keep his story straight, and the whole thing is looking more and more like a personal vendetta.
The 16-page report from Lt. Col. Mark E. Winn castigates as unreliable the prosecution’s chief witness, Sgt. Daniel L. Coburn, whom Lt. Pantano had removed as squad leader weeks before the April 14, 2004 shooting.
“The government was not able to produce credible evidence or testimony that the killings were premeditated,” Col. Winn wrote in his report, a copy of which was obtained today by The Washington Times.
“I think now [Sgt. Coburn] is in a position where he has told his story so many times, in so many versions that he cannot keep his facts straight anymore,” Col. Winn wrote of the chief witness.
President Junior should have stepped in and cleared Pantano early on, but far be it for me to expect such backbone from the Oval Orifice.
As we had all hoped, gargantuan whitey-hating Oliver Willis has finally started blogging for Arianna Huffington – well at least they’re bringing in experienced bloggers over there instead of simply using washed-up lackwitted celebrities.
You watching the NBA playoffs? Me neither. I haven’t watched the NBA since Darryl Dawkins a/k/a Chocolate Thunder smashed his first backboard in Kansas City on November 13, 1979. He called it the “The Chocolate-Thunder-Flying, Robinzine-Crying, Teeth-Shaking, Glass-Breaking, Rump-Roasting, Bun-Toasting, Wham-Bam, Glass-Breaker-I-Am-Jam” dunk. It left shards of glass in Dr. J’s afro. The NBA has been on a steady decline since that evening. Just so you know, no point in watching, so don’t bother.
That’s about it, looks like a tsunami is coming in so better go grab my surfboard.
May 19th, 2005 at 9:26 pm
The only problem is that the Marine Corps still plans to charge Lt. Pantano with shooting too many bullets or some such nonsense. How many bullets is too many when you are defending yourself? What a garbage concept.
May 19th, 2005 at 9:57 pm
That’s a load of shit. The correct number of bullets required = the number necessary to eliminate the threat. Pantano shouldn’t be charged with a damn thing, except doing his job and doing it well.