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Preston Taylor Holmes
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Lady Vol Ball

May 26th, 2005 at 6:45 pm by Preston Taylor Holmes

Brittany Jackson is the only possible argument I could ever see for watching Lady Vols Basketball.

Brittany Jackson’s Official Website

This post has been submitted to Rusty’s trackback festival. And because he “enjoys the ladies”. And Editors in Pajamas wants to start a “trackback chain” which sounds pretty nasty to me.


It’s absurd for this story to have an update, but it does. You would not believe the amount of hand-wringing and gnashing of teeth going on surrounding Brittany Jackson’s website – particularly on local Knoxville talk-radio.

I heard Jimmy Hyams and John Wilkerson bellyaching on WNOX’s sports show yesterday afternoon about how the site is “inappropriate” and could tarnish the image of Pat Summitt and the Lady Vols.

I suppose Brittany’s site – which shows a very attractive student/athlete in mildly seductive heterosexual-themed photos – does go against the image I have of Lady Vols’ basketball which is that of a bunch of 7-foot bulldykes being cheered on in an arena half-filled with same-sex couples enjoying the only politically correct sport in the area.

Yeah, a website portraying an attractive, heterosexual, white Lady Vol basketball player does pretty much fly in the face of the traditional Lady Vols image. Luckily, Brittany has graduated, so they can get back to rebuilding their tarnished image next season.

26 Responses to “Lady Vol Ball”

  1. MacStansbury Says:

    amazing. my Dad’s been watching Lady Vol basketball since they got real good in the 80s. it was about the best part of living in Knoxville. in fact, the highlight of my life had been living a block away from Kelly Casteel (?).

    but…wow…wow is she hot. the only time I would watch the games was when she would be in the game. and now…I think I’m in love.


  2. Hector Vex's Infotainment Says:

    Dale Arden Presents – Free Music Fridays!
    Oh, to pimp this post I sent a trackback to Rusty for his festival of fatwas.. so it’s only fair that you go check out the Jawa Report. I also sent a trackback to Preston, for no reason whatsoever.

  3. Hector Vex Says:

    Nice. I wouldn’t mind sinking a two-pointer in her basket – if you know what I mean.

  4. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    Vex, I have no idea what you mean. What do you mean?

  5. Hector Vex Says:

    I mean, that she could dribble on my half court anytime.

    I mean, that she could let me shoot free throws at her all day.

    I think I’m out of sexual innuendos in reference to basketball.

  6. the Pirate Says:

    Drive her lane.
    Take it to the hole.

    Obligatory Bill Walton quote:
    Slam it down big man.

  7. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    I knew someone would come through with more tasteless innuendos! Thanks Pirate!

  8. Lance Says:

    I think I would probably make a premature pass out of bounds.

    Although I think my double dribble days are over.

    I could also receive a technical and be ejected from the game.

    In all honesty she is probably too much player for me. My game aint what it used to be.

  9. the Pirate Says:

    Thats what I’m here for.

    Okay being from LA and that you want Basketball quotes the following ones from the Late Great Chick Hearn would also apply:
    Bloooows the layup!
    Bunny hop in the pea patch
    Covered like the rug on your floor
    Caught with his hand in the cookie jar
    He has two chances, slim and none, and slim just left the building.
    94-by-50 hunk of wood
    If that goes in, I’m walking home
    The mustard’s off the Hot-dog
    Nailed to the floor

    Thats pretty funny they are complaing about breaking the lesbo image of the sport, kind of like Finch & softball.

  10. Hector Vex Says:

    Ok ok.. I’m not much of a basketball fan… thanks for the assist Pirate.

    If women basketball players start being hot chicks too (not just giant bull dykes that look like Scottie Pippen) then perhaps more men would watch their sport. I’d rather see a bunch of unskilled hot chicks running and jumping then a bunch of skilled free throw shooting monsters.

  11. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:


    It would probably be funnier if they were actually worried about preserving the lesbo image, but it’s more of a “how dare she pose in a swimsuit!” type of outrage. This is puritannical East Tennessee, you know.

    I had to go with the dyke angle because I once went to a Lady Vols game and the last time I’d seen that many dykes was at a K.D. Lang concert in Worcester, Massachusetts.

  12. Michael Says:

    The Lady Vols have done more to bring resepct to Tennessee basketball than the men have done…EVER

  13. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    Uh oh. Looks like I hit one of Big Orange Michael’s hot buttons.

  14. the Pirate Says:

    I took it a similar way, as a “how dare she show off her femininity” but it soo much fun making lesbo references.

    Speaking of lesbo references we had on of those with the WNBA a few years ago there were stories of on player on the Sparks sexually assulting another player. I thinks she later sued the Sparks for cutting her.

  15. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    Haven’t we discussed women’s basketball enough for one day? The mere mention of the WNBA on my blog is making me physically ill.

  16. Kevin Says:

    This lesbo angle might actually work in Brittany’s favor, if played correctly. No less a “Raging Bull” than Rosie O’Donnell once joked about the furor caused by LaToya Jackson posing nude in “Playboy,” by noting that if she (Raging Bull) had a body like LaToya’s, she (Raging Bull) would be dancing naked down the isles of supermarkets, handling the melons, and exclaiming: “Isn’t THIS a ripe one!” Guess the politcally correct position is that it’s ok to parade less than fully clothed if the woman involved and/or the intended viewer is “firm-wristed.” Maybe we should start the rumor that Brittany swings only to the left, her site is directed only to the lesbian community, and, thus, it’s business-as-usual for the Lady Vols. No, wait, girl-on-girl action with a beautiful amazon lesbian involved is actually hot to heterosexual males. Never mind…

  17. MacStansbury Says:

    I would just like to add…is there some kind of NCAA rule that them jerseys they wear couldn’t….you know….be a little…well…looser? more of a neckline, if you will.

    I’m just thinking about ratings. and getting the sport legitimized. honest.

    â–º> Measurements: 38-30-38, shoe 10.

  18. Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith Says:

    Did somebody say Bulldykes?

  19. Anonymous Says:

    Whats all the fuss about I mean really! Nothing at all wrong with the site she is trying to make a living. ANd there is nothing wrong with that site.

  20. Kell Raines Says:

    I am a female from Tennessee. Totally heterosexual but I enjoy watching the Lady Vols. I have never thought women’s bball was about lesbians. Yes, a lot of the players are very tall and very muscular but then there is Brittany. Even though she is 6 ft tall, she is definitely feminine with a capital F. She is beautiful and I think her site is awesome. I agree if more players looked like Brittany more males would be watching. I think it is because we live in the Bible belt but those shots are not “revealing” – you see as much in a Victoria’s Secret catalog (which may be where she purchased the blue lingerie – as yes it is lingerie and not a bikini) I say so Brittany!

  21. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    Kell, first of all, thanks for visiting. Second of all, I completely agree with you about Brittany being totally hot. And I never said that you had to be a butch lesbian to enjoy Lady Vols roundball. That’s its major demographic, however. Drop by again! I love it when hetero chicks stop in and declare their heterosexuality.

  22. Al Crowley Says:

    :twisted: I can’t wait to see Brittanys Vagina.. If there is anything left of it.

  23. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    Al, I am completely horrified by your comment.

    It’s Brittany’s vagina. And vagina isn’t capitalized. Unless it’s somebody’s name, like “Vagina Watson”. Or it’s part of a shitty piece of performance art such as “Vagina Monologues”.

    Please, proper grammar, especially when discussing female genitalia.

  24. MacStansbury Says:

    HEY! I remember this story!

    sigh…good times, good times…cue flashback music and puddle wipe…

  25. IllinoisVolFan Says:

    What absolute dreck. :evil:
    You would rather watch bimbos play in lingerie than watch skilled athletes in tough competition?:???: I suppose you never tune in men’s football – wouldn’t want to watch any athletes you can’t treat as sex objects – oh:idea:, wait, maybe I got that wrong – maybe you DO watch men’s athletics and DO consider them sex objects! You’re all guttersnipes.

  26. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    I forgot how funny this comment thread was. Thanks for the reminder! I think I need to add this post to the classics.

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