Terror Threat Against Subway
October 6th, 2005 at 9:33 pm by Preston Taylor HolmesDetails are still sketchy, but apparently there has been a credible terror threat against Subway.
I’ve been talking to some folks who should be concerned about this threat, but they seem to be completely unaware of the threat.
“We ain’t heard shit about that.”
“You’re stupid.”
After a little more research, I found out that the threat is specifically against New York Subways. So I contacted these Rochester women.
“The only threat here, sir, is the threat of a low-fat,
calorie-conscious meal. Would you like
to try the new Chicken Parmesan?”
For some reason, this is a tough story to get information about at this time. I’ll update when I’m able to do more research and provide you, the reader, with more fake, but accurate, details.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
October 6th, 2005 at 9:37 pm
mmmmmmmm….subway.
October 6th, 2005 at 9:55 pm
Dang, I wish I had a blog so I could trackback this! Frame three is priceless.
October 6th, 2005 at 10:34 pm
al-Quiznos?
October 7th, 2005 at 2:36 am
al-Quiznos is the Palestinian to the Jew of Subway.
October 7th, 2005 at 7:39 am
Vintage Preston Litella.
October 7th, 2005 at 8:19 am
Actually, President Junior is working with authorities from Al-Quiznos and Subway to create an independent Al-Quiznos state inside every Subway store.
October 7th, 2005 at 1:17 pm
[...] Apparently I have been around here, meaning Knoxville, way too long. I say this because certain things seem to run in the minds of those around here that just do not cross the minds of others. It it with that thought that I must report that I had same thought as Preston over at Six Meat Buffet when I about the subway threat this AM. Six Meat’s post here. [...]
October 8th, 2005 at 5:58 am
Preston, I don’t believe for one second that al-Quiznos would be behind this purported Subway attack. Remember that the leader of al-Quiznos won the Nobel Peace Prize a few years back for creating the peaceful sense of satisfaction in millions of consumers with warm, savory sandwiches?
I think you just apologize to everyone who is an al-Quiznos supporter…not all al-Quiznos workers are terrorists, ya know? Most are peaceful sandwich artists who just want to overcome the giant, powerful grip of Subway BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY…like toasting their sandwich bread, for example.
October 10th, 2005 at 6:18 pm
That skinny-assed terrorist Jared always looked kinda shifty to me…