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Preston Taylor Holmes
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Michelle Wie Disqualified, Still Hot as Hell

October 17th, 2005 at 8:11 am by Preston Taylor Holmes

I’ve never had a favorite female golfer before. Now I do. Problem is, she’s only 16, so the older LPGA players still have time to rob her of her heterosexuality.

Anyway, she got DQ’d this weekend after finishing fourth in the Samsung World Championships in Palm Desert, California – and I’m not talking about the little-known sexual maneuver, the “Dairy Queen,” popular in small towns across the midwest. I’m talking disqualified. For an illegal ball-drop.

A couple of hours after finishing fourth in her first professional tournament, 16-year-old Michelle Wie was sensationally disqualified from the Samsung World Championship at Bighorn in Palm Desert, California.

It was 40 minutes before play finished that a spectator told LPGA rules official Robert Smith that he thought Wie had dropped the ball nearer the hole when she had taken relief from an unplayable lie in a bush on the seventh hole of her third-round 71 on Saturday.

Minutes after she had completed her final-round 74, Smith took Wie and her caddie, Greg Johnston, back to the spot at the 470-yard hole and deemed that she had indeed taken an incorrect drop.

“It was 12 to 15 inches closer to the hole,” he explained. “Because of that, she broke Rule 20-7 and the penalty is two shots. But because she had not declared the penalty before she signed the scorecard, then I’m sad to say that it is a disqualification.

Typical LPGA tattletale fan. The fan was probably angry that there was an attractive woman allowed on the tour. Don’t sweat it, Michelle, you’ll still make gazillions in endorsements even if you pull a Kournikova and never win a title.


Debbie Schlussel has some more scoop on the Sports Illustrated reporter who was actually the one to tattle on Wie for dropping her ball incorrectly. Typical yellow journalist.

12 Responses to “Michelle Wie Disqualified, Still Hot as Hell”

  1. Yiddish Steel Says:

    “A Kournikova”?! Please! Michelle Wie is going to dominate the LPGA for 20 years. They’ll have to institute a special “Wie Rule” eventually to give the other women a chance to compete. Even Anika Sorenstam knows this and is already talking retirement at the ripe old age of 34.

  2. Michael Says:

    Seriously….have you seen Natalie Gulbis?


  3. Vinnie Says:

    For God’s sake man…


    Couldn’t you hold off the drool machine for 2 stinkin years?


  4. Chip Says:

    I think that most of us were at least thinking it. And hey, if she comes to SC, shes legal.

  5. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    Hey, the drool machine has a mind of its own. I’m not responsible.

  6. The Unabrewer Says:

    If there’s grass on the fairway, tee off.

  7. Vinnie Says:

    If they’re old enough to bleed, they’re old enough to breed.

    sigh, if you can’t beat em, join em.

    But I’m buying another gun, just in case you horny bastards try to look askance at my daughter.

  8. Vince Aut Morire Says:

    Been Busy Link Dump

    How can you not like a man who roots for…

  9. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:

    You boys are sicker than me.

  10. Feisty Says:

    Child molester.

  11. MacStansbury Says:

    there’s a joke in the word “askance” that I just can’t make.

    it’s like, something about how the word sounds…

    I’m too tired right now. maybe tomorrow.

  12. Overtaken by Events Says:

    A Wie Bit Miffed

    I’m sure you’ll find this unbelievable, but I am somewhat late to the Michelle Wie story from last weekend. If…

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