Would you believe I was a Star Trek fan growing up? Shocking, I know. But it wasn’t until after many, many reruns and quite a few years that I really caught some of the innuendo.

For example, I was 17 before I realized that Captain Kirk was sexually active.

Remember the episode with the people who move so fast you can only hear them buzzing like flies? There’s this scene where Kirk starts kissing yet another fabulous alien babe, then the fade to a commercial break. When we return Kirk is pulling his boot on and the alien is brushing her hair.

Now, on the eve of my 40th, I finally understand this scene from The Doomsday Machine:

Sulu: Captain, the photon torpedos had no effect on the Planet Killer!

Kirk: Put it on Main Screen.

Kirk and Sulu: Dayum!

Kirk: Mr. Sulu, here’s what I want you to do: set a course right into the heart of that thing. If we can’t kill it, we’ll ram ourselves right into that rock-hard shaft.

Sulu: Sir, I’ll need you to take the helm, my hands won’t stop trembling.

Kirk: [setting the course] Take it! Take it you enormous beast!

Sulu: Aye Captain!

Kirk: Huh?

More discussion at Ace and The Jawa Report (yes, it’s the bad kind).

Posted by Cranky @ 9:10 pm
6 Comments and 2 Trackbacks | Permalink | Trackback URI

Comments

:: Trackbacks/Pingbacks ::

1. Sunday Funnies

   Image Provided by Faith Mouse.com
   Shoot A Liberal has the Carnival of Comedy
   Rightwing Nuthouse has The Carnival of the Clueless
   Cao’s Blog has a Trick or Treat Boo! She’s also amused with wacking the monkey!
   Conservative Cat has a list …

   Trackback by Stop The ACLU — Sunday, October 30, 2005 2:14 am | permalink

   
   

2. [...] Iowahawk is asking for membership in the legion of the dumb. Six Meat Buffet has found the The Great Pumpkin! And they finally come clean that they are a dorky trekie. Why do I always find it irrestable to make fun of trekies when I am one myself? [...]

   Pingback by Stop The ACLU » Blog Archive » Sunday Funnies — Sunday, October 30, 2005 7:39 am | permalink

   
   

:: Comments ::

1. Gigantic space colon. I had no idea at the time. I feel better knowing it now.

   comment by Preston Taylor Holmes — Friday, October 28, 2005 @ 9:44 pm

   ---

2. Seems like Kirk’s Brand Space Rubbers could still be a hit at the Trekkie conventions. For when sex is alien to you.

   comment by Smantix — Saturday, October 29, 2005 @ 5:24 am

   ---

3. LOL. Nice one Smantix. Say, isn’t Smantix a brand of latex?

   comment by Cranky — Saturday, October 29, 2005 @ 1:50 pm

   ---

4. I believe that is Sementix

   comment by Smantix — Saturday, October 29, 2005 @ 4:48 pm

   ---

5. “Kirk’s Brand Space Rubbers”

   That’s shy Sulu wanted Kirk to take the helm. You know, being Asian and all, difficult to fill Capt. Kirks’…ummmmm… shoes.

   comment by Kiki B. — Saturday, October 29, 2005 @ 8:30 pm

   ---

6. Any man who wears eyeshadow is guilty until proven straight.

   comment by Smantix — Sunday, October 30, 2005 @ 2:29 pm

   ---

Leave a Comment

Sorry, comments are closed at this time.