I Was Too Young To Understand It At The Time

October 28th, 2005 at 9:10 pm by Cranky

Would you believe I was a Star Trek fan growing up? Shocking, I know. But it wasn’t until after many, many reruns and quite a few years that I really caught some of the innuendo.

For example, I was 17 before I realized that Captain Kirk was sexually active.

Remember the episode with the people who move so fast you can only hear them buzzing like flies? There’s this scene where Kirk starts kissing yet another fabulous alien babe, then the fade to a commercial break. When we return Kirk is pulling his boot on and the alien is brushing her hair.

Now, on the eve of my 40th, I finally understand this scene from The Doomsday Machine:

Sulu: Captain, the photon torpedos had no effect on the Planet Killer!

Kirk: Put it on Main Screen.

Kirk and Sulu: Dayum!

Kirk: Mr. Sulu, here’s what I want you to do: set a course right into the heart of that thing. If we can’t kill it, we’ll ram ourselves right into that rock-hard shaft.

Sulu: Sir, I’ll need you to take the helm, my hands won’t stop trembling.

Kirk: [setting the course] Take it! Take it you enormous beast!

Sulu: Aye Captain!

Kirk: Huh?

More discussion at Ace and The Jawa Report (yes, it’s the bad kind).

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8 Responses to “I Was Too Young To Understand It At The Time”

1. Preston Taylor Holmes Says:
   October 28th, 2005 at 9:44 pm

   Gigantic space colon. I had no idea at the time. I feel better knowing it now.

2. Smantix Says:
   October 29th, 2005 at 5:24 am

   Seems like Kirk’s Brand Space Rubbers could still be a hit at the Trekkie conventions. For when sex is alien to you.

3. Cranky Says:
   October 29th, 2005 at 1:50 pm

   LOL. Nice one Smantix. Say, isn’t Smantix a brand of latex?

4. Smantix Says:
   October 29th, 2005 at 4:48 pm

   I believe that is Sementix

5. Kiki B. Says:
   October 29th, 2005 at 8:30 pm

   “Kirk’s Brand Space Rubbers”

   That’s shy Sulu wanted Kirk to take the helm. You know, being Asian and all, difficult to fill Capt. Kirks’…ummmmm… shoes.

6. Stop The ACLU Says:
   October 30th, 2005 at 2:14 am

   Sunday Funnies

   Image Provided by Faith Mouse.com
   Shoot A Liberal has the Carnival of Comedy
   Rightwing Nuthouse has The Carnival of the Clueless
   Cao’s Blog has a Trick or Treat Boo! She’s also amused with wacking the monkey!
   Conservative Cat has a list …

7. Stop The ACLU » Blog Archive » Sunday Funnies Says:
   October 30th, 2005 at 7:39 am

   [...] Iowahawk is asking for membership in the legion of the dumb. Six Meat Buffet has found the The Great Pumpkin! And they finally come clean that they are a dorky trekie. Why do I always find it irrestable to make fun of trekies when I am one myself? [...]

8. Smantix Says:
   October 30th, 2005 at 2:29 pm

   Any man who wears eyeshadow is guilty until proven straight.