It’s Time To Take A Stand
June 14th, 2006 at 9:09 pm by CrankyA great American philosopher once said, “Democrats are the party of government activism, the party that says government can make you richer, smarter, taller and get the chickweed out of your lawn. Republicans are the party that says government doesn’t work, and then they get elected and prove it.”*
We’re gonna TAKE THE COUNTRY BACK! But we need your help!
Join the Insufferable Prick Party as we offer Americans a true alternative to government that serves its own interest.
Here is your chance! Help us define a platform, develop slogans and send Washington a message this November.
Please submit your ideas in the comments section.
Samples: “Tired of your representation? This year, you can stick a prick in there.” -Doug
A billboard ad. From Kevin
Thanks to Andrew Kaduk for the logo.
Thanks to Vinnie for leading by example.
Thanks to Sharpy for creating the original inspirational Republicrat logo.
Note to Little Miss Attila and Linda: Yes, you girls can be Insufferable Pricks too. You don’t have to be a pre-op tranny, post-op tranny, hermy or generic transgender to join the party. Chicks can be Pricks too (since it’s really metaphorical and all…).
Platform Positions
(Feel free to help us develop our platform)
Gay Rights
What makes you think we care where you stuff your man-yams? With the $700 million we won’t earmark to move railroad tracks, you will be able to buy a locking door. Go nuts.
Climate Change
There is nothing more sanctimonious or arrogant than a polar ice cap. We say bring back aerosol spray cans and freon so we can show the planet who’s boss.
Education Reform
Teachers must be capable of passing the same exams as the students.
We’ll leave behind “No Child Left Behind”.
Vouchers aplenty… and they can be used to escape inner-city hellholes.
Gitmo
A length of rope with every Koran and prayer rug.
Gun Control
Don’t make me shoot you.
Illegal Immigration
You wanna mow lawns for a living?
I did NOT say land mimes!
Death Penalty
Chair, needle or noose – pick one.
Firing squads are very appealing, and cheap.
Energy Policy
Enough windmills in Kennebunkport to make the Dutch blush.
Enough oil wells in ANWR to make the caribou mush.
More people died at Chappaquidick than Three Mile Island
War in Iraq
The Insufferable Pricks vow to end this PC war.
Our goal is to fight a real war.
Get the troops out of Iraq and Afganistan.
Invade Iran.
First Amendment Rights
This right must never be impinged upon, even in cases of flag desecration or “protesting” military funerals. In fact, we will extend the First Amendment to include administering a “beat down” on funeral protestors as a legitimate expression of free speech as well.
Chickweed
Definitely against.
Campaign Slogans
Insufferable Pricks: When all of the other pricks have gotten too soft for positions of power.
(Kevin has broken out his Jesse Jackson Rhyming Whiggity-Whack Box for the following):
*Welfare – Au Contraire!
*Taxed for dying – You must be lying!
*Judges can’t make laws – The Constitution contains no clause’
(plural, but it doesn’t rhyme well. This one should be primarily used at hippie drum circles because of the slant rhyme.)
*Close the borders – and break out the mortars, or We don’t want to whine – so line our borders with mines!
Insufferable Pricks: Pumping for oil in ANWR… and your mom.
The Insufferable Pricks- A Pig in every pot, and a Prick in every… District?
We have a hard-on for a common sense method of leading our country!
UPDATE: Join the Insufferable Pricks Party Blogroll!
* Parliament of Whores, P.J. O’Rourke
June 14th, 2006 at 10:39 pm
Oh baby, it’s on now.
June 14th, 2006 at 11:28 pm
Open Mouth Insert Both Feet…
Talk about making things worse. She goes from calling him a slave to an Uncle Tom to a hair ball. LMAO People would be better off voting for this insufferable…
June 14th, 2006 at 11:29 pm
Woo-hoo!
A length of rope with every Koran and prayer rug in Gitmo!
June 14th, 2006 at 11:34 pm
[...] Or get out of our way. [...]
June 14th, 2006 at 11:37 pm
Insufferable Pricks: When all of the other pricks have gotten too soft for positions of power.
June 15th, 2006 at 2:01 am
Hmm, you have some very persuasive slogans here. But… I mean, I really hate chickweed…
June 15th, 2006 at 3:42 am
The Time Has Come….
I just hope that either women can be honorary pricks in this party, or that there’s an auxiliary organization for Arrogant Cunts (’cause I have friends . . . you know)…….
June 15th, 2006 at 7:01 am
[...] Preston Taylor Holmes (Six Meat Buffet) offers a new choice at the polls. [...]
June 15th, 2006 at 7:20 am
[...] at least, that’s what a lot of people have been telling me….Six Meat Buffet » It’s Time To Take A Stand Filed under: Politics Comments: [...]
June 15th, 2006 at 7:41 am
Can a girl be an Insufferable Prick?…
Yeah, I think I qualify. It’s Time To Take A Stand……
June 15th, 2006 at 7:43 am
I’m in. I got nothing better to do and I’m loaded right now anyways.
How about a stance on alternative fuels?
God didn’t kill the dinosaurs so we couldn’t use their remains to fuel our gaz guzzling SUV’s. When you see that soccer mom backing into a mailbox because she can’t see, remember – that’s an act of God. Driving a Hybrid will only assure your place in Hell.
Too religious? Dunno. How about Illegal Immigration? That’s a tough one these days.
What do you think is going to cost you more? Buying health insurance for your wetback dishwasher, or hiring some black guy instead, who will work half as fast, steal twice as much and then not show up to work?
Or even simpler:
You wanna mow lawns for a living?
June 15th, 2006 at 7:50 am
Insufferable Pricks in 2006…
Of course, leave it to Preston to take politics to yet another new low….
June 15th, 2006 at 8:03 am
When in doubt, write-in ‘Charlie Brown’ and let the government spend the rest of the year counting ballots.
June 15th, 2006 at 8:16 am
Unrestricted harvesting of trees containing halfwit Hollywood has-beens and smelly hippies.
June 15th, 2006 at 9:21 am
re: Illegal Immigration
I\’ll mow my own damn lawn.
June 15th, 2006 at 9:44 am
It\’s time to take a stand: join the Insufferable Prick Party…
It\’s time to take a stand: join the Insufferable Prick Party…
June 15th, 2006 at 10:01 am
Education reform (NCLB)
Teachers must be capable of passing the same exams as the students.
We’ll leave behind “No Child Left Behind”.
Vouchers aplenty… and they can be used to escape inner-city hellholes.
June 15th, 2006 at 12:39 pm
Woohoo, andti-chickweed! Finally a party that knows what’s important!
Here’s some rhyming slogans for the IPP:
*Welfare – Au Contraire!
*Taxed for dying – You must be lying!
*Judges can’t make laws – The Constitution contains no clause’(plural, but it doesn’t rhyme well. This one should be primarily used at hippie drum circles because of the slant rhyme.)
*Close the borders – and break out the mortars, or We don’t want to whine – so line our borders with mines!
June 15th, 2006 at 5:40 pm
I’ve been thinking, and there’s no way this is gonna go over as a slogan for a national party, but here it is anyway.
The Insufferable Pricks- A Pig in every pot, and a Prick in every… District?
June 15th, 2006 at 8:59 pm
Gun control — Don’t make me shoot you.
June 15th, 2006 at 10:52 pm
Death Penalty
Chair, needle, or noose. Pick one.
Energy – Renewables
Enough windmills in Kennebunkport to make the Dutch blush.
Energy – Non-Renewables
Enough oil wells in ANWR to make the caribou mush.
June 15th, 2006 at 11:18 pm
Insufferable Pricks Semi-Anonymous…
……
June 16th, 2006 at 12:54 am
The Insufferable Pricks vow to end this PC war.
Our goal is to fight a real war.
Get the troops out of Iraq and Afganistan.
Invade Iran.
June 16th, 2006 at 12:59 am
***Breaking, Must Cite Jawa Report***…
A viable 3rd party has been established to challenge the status quo. Do you have what it takes to be one of us?……
June 16th, 2006 at 1:17 am
Oh, and thank you Cranky.
Crisis averted.
June 16th, 2006 at 1:23 am
Um….
On the ACLU: If they cancel Christmas and rip down our crosses we’ll shove them up their asses!
June 16th, 2006 at 8:32 am
I. P. Standing Up.
June 16th, 2006 at 8:49 am
Now I know that ain’t true.
June 16th, 2006 at 9:21 am
Death Row Appeals – Firing squads are very appealing, and cheap.
Oil Exploration – the new 21st century front lawn jockey, hang a lantern on a oil well. Lube it with a caribou.
Border Control – I did NOT say land mimes!
June 16th, 2006 at 11:36 am
I Am A Prick…
I have just found my new political party thanks to SixMeatBuffet…
June 16th, 2006 at 11:50 am
Sorry I’m late.
Insufferable pricks, pumping for oil in ANWR… and your mom.
June 16th, 2006 at 2:00 pm
Great Post, I linked you on my blog
June 16th, 2006 at 2:02 pm
Wood you all rise (with stiff drink in hand)as I toast the forthcoming emergence of the Insufferable Prick Party as a major political player. What a stroke of genius!
June 16th, 2006 at 2:12 pm
Energy Alternatives – Nuclear Safety
More people died at Chappaquidick than Three Mile Island
——
When and where is the first convention?
June 16th, 2006 at 4:14 pm
The Insufferable Prick Party…
We’re ROCK HARD (or Have A Hard-On) for a common sense method of leading our country!
June 16th, 2006 at 7:31 pm
foreign policy —
Save money by combining the State Dept with the Defense Dept. no need for a Sec. of State.
Agree and support the USA
or be nuked till you glow and shot after dark.
June 17th, 2006 at 2:12 pm
Amendment to the 1st Amendment-
Any entertainers (i.e. Dixie Chicks)who use their platform (and high school GED) to enlighten us with their wisdom on foreign policy or the military shall be required to repeat such comments in front of an entire platoon of beered-up United States Marines.
June 18th, 2006 at 11:31 am
Rites of Spring…
Every year, at the end of the semester, I put on the bottom of my teaching evaluations whether the instructor showed any bias in favor of any particular ideology or party, and if so, what was it. Most all say……
June 18th, 2006 at 12:15 pm
Take Our Country Back ~ Insufferable Prick Party Leads The Way…
You can read the Platform Positions at his blog…..Six Meat Buffet. This is a must read. hahaha I LOVE it! Join the Insufferable Prick Party as we offer Americans a true alternative to government that serves its own interest.
…
June 18th, 2006 at 12:46 pm
Campaign Slogan
Insufferable Pricks – The Head of the Class
June 18th, 2006 at 1:42 pm
Term Limits
June 18th, 2006 at 9:48 pm
Insufferable Prick Party…
I have decided to endorse the Insufferable Prick Party, particularly after they endorsed my common sense solution to gun control.
…
June 19th, 2006 at 7:11 am
Social Politics
Insufferable Pricks – Where the men are men and not called “Metrosexual”.
June 19th, 2006 at 5:25 pm
Land mimes? Do you mean to have Shields and Yarnell patrol the Texas border, Marcel Marceau the Arizona? It’s crazy enough, it just might work!
June 19th, 2006 at 5:29 pm
Pride: I am an Insufferable Prick!…
I would add the following Campaign Promise:
An “Ethanol” still in every backyard!
He said “Ethanol” heh-heh [wink]…
June 26th, 2006 at 1:06 pm
PORK…It’s not just for Senators anymore!
September 7th, 2006 at 12:51 pm
[...] This is just fantastic! [...]
September 13th, 2006 at 4:09 am
Two Pary Politics
Welfare Reform
We should make a welfare state, move everyone on welfare to that state, then sell it to Mexico on the cheap.
War on Terror
Lets make the biggest producers of oil in the world to the biggest producers of green glass.
First Ammendment
If you’re going to talk like an idiot just shut up, please.
October 3rd, 2006 at 10:23 am
[...] Updates, forsooth! At long last, a real-world, practical answer. Dig that platform. [...]
November 19th, 2006 at 5:50 pm
I WANT IN NOW!!!!!
December 4th, 2006 at 8:20 am
Its simple….
I’m tired of supporting all the lazy bastards in this country. “If you don’t work then you don’t eat” End of story!!!!!