Well, not really live blogging it, since I just finished it. I could, however, liveblog it as it moves on through the digestive process and eventually works its way out. But I won’t do that to you. I have too much respeck for you, dawg.

I’m actually liveblogging doing some work-related work from home and watching some U.S. Open coverage. Looks like Roddick/Pless is headed to a 2nd-set tiebreak at this point. Holy shit, is this shaping up to be a tedious post. Anyway, on with the news of the day and what I think about it. Because that’s what matters.

Looks like Hurricane Ernesto went all limp. You could almost see a single, solitary tear well up in the bloodshot eye of The Weather Channel’s Jim Cantore. He wanted to cry – with every ounce of his being, he wanted to cry, but he was able to hold it back. Good for him, I say. We have enough media pussies bursting into tears at the drop of a hat.

Speaking of weather alerts, Feisty is on top of Hurricane John. That so fits.

How about this goat raping SUV driver who ran down a bunch of infidels in San Fransissy? As is their standard operating procedure, the media is trying really hard to avoid using the words “muslim,” “islam,” or “camel fellater” in their coverage of the infidel smasher. In an often-precedented turn-of-events, the towel-headed driver in question, Omeed Aziz Muhammed Muhammed Poopal, ended his rampage at – wait for it – a Jewish temple. Those damn Jews – always getting in the way of crazed muslims, when they’re just trying to exercise their religious civil rights.

The guy picked the right city, though. You know nobody in San Fransissy is armed. When an entire population has been deprived of its right to self-defense, the infidels are easy pickins! If that had happened in an American town like Dallas or Wichita, somebody would have blown the asshole’s so-called brains out and we’d all be better off. Instead, we’ll have to listen to the media fawning all over him and his “mental illness.” All the islamofascists are mentally ill, but you already knew that.

Roddick took the second-set tiebreak easily. You can chalk this one up. Ooooh – Agassi/Baghdatis is tomorrow night – I hope Baghdatis’ girlfriend made the trip to NYC. Ginepri just got through to the 2nd round – who was the hot actress he was banging for a while? I can’t remember. Someone will remind me.

So, back to the news of the day. Seems that a dimwitted old Senator from Alaska (yeah, Stevens) singlehandedly put the squash on a bill that would have brought some fiscal accountability to the Senate. He’s a dick. So is the vast majority of the Senate – both GOP and Donk alike. The entire Senate can cram it so far up their collective colons that blood comes out. Worthless money whores.

Anyway, enough about those dicks. Roddick just closed out the match against Pless. His third-round opponent? Roscoe Tanner. There are some rumors going around the Open that Roddick and Sharapova are exchanging bodily fluids. Lucky bastard.

Oh, back to the Religion of Peace™. The Saudis, beloved home of the most virulent strains of islam, has released “700 reformed al-Qaeda”. What the hell did they do to reform them? Teach them how to make more accurate nail-bombs? Give them new and improved methods of hating Jews and Christians? Give them flying lessons? But don’t worry, President Junior says the Saudis are our friends. If that’s good enough for you, that’s good enough for me.

I wonder what Wuzzadem’s up to. It’s gotta be better than this. Yep.

Oh well, now that I’ve bored the pants off you, why don’t you go do something about it. I’ve got to make the coffee and hit the sack.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 30th, 2006 at 10:17 pm and is filed under Bizarro, Cavalcade of Whimsy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.