Note To Self: 4-Year-Olds Don’t Speak in Metaphors
November 28th, 2006 at 12:39 pm by Preston Taylor HolmesThe other night, Preston Jr. was very concerned and kept getting up after being put to bed. This is unusual. He’s usually out like a light soon after prayers.
He came downstairs and with great despair, said that his piggy bank was gone. Where was he going to put his quarters (for gumballs) with his piggy bank gone? Due to the fact that we’re in the process of moving to a new house, nearly everything had been packed up, including the piggy banks.
Being the incompetent parent that I am, naturally, I assume that what he’s really upset about is the transition into a new house from the only house he’s ever known. Seemed like a logical conclusion to me. It’s not really about the piggy bank – the piggy bank merely represents his anxiety about moving to a new house and a new neighborhood. The piggy bank is just a metaphor for his pending upheaval.
He later woke us up around 1:30 am, still worried about his piggy bank. I tried to reassure him by letting him know that he’d have his piggy bank at his new house.
Demonstrating far more parental competence and understanding of child psychology, Mrs. Holmes got up, unpacked the piggy bank, put it back in his room (precisely where he demanded) and off he went to sleep. When I brought it up later, she emphasized, “he really wanted his piggy bank.”
Sometimes a piggy bank is just a piggy bank.
November 28th, 2006 at 1:35 pm
It was just some liberal crap that seemed into your melon from a university professor or some parenting book you read.
And while 4-year olds might not speak in metaphors, your child’s story itself IS a metaphor for today.
These crazy islamopoops want to kill everyone and blow things up. Libs like Jimmy Carter want us to examine the root causes of this rage…maybe analyze how we have inflicted pain on this Muslim generation…and perhaps come to an understanding with these people who really love peace.
Of course the real answer is that these Islamopigs are just crazy and want to kill everyone and blow things up.
Comparing your 4-year old to Islamodicks isn’t really what I meant, Preston. Your kid shows more maturity and grasp of reality than any of them.
Just so you didn’t think I was taking a shot at you or your kid.
November 28th, 2006 at 2:04 pm
Might we be overanalyzing what a four-year-old says just a wee bit?
That’s a damn funny little story.
November 28th, 2006 at 3:40 pm
So if we give the Islamoasshats a piggybank will they just go to sleep and leave everyone alone?
November 28th, 2006 at 4:16 pm
My kid looked me straight in the eye and actually said this when she was four years old, “Mommy, sometimes I want you to die so I can have Daddy all to myself.” We have never had to glean meaning out of this kid, but sometimes she comes off a bit abrasive.:shock: Maybe if I taught her to say “metaphorically speaking” after these kinds of statements I wouldn’t be so concerned about her being able to reach the knife drawer (metaphorically speaking, that is.).:wink:
November 28th, 2006 at 4:19 pm
Well, no. We can’t give them a PIGGYbank because they go apeshit over anything porcine.
I tried to give a Muslim this peace-offering:
http://s41.photobucket.com/albums/e257/allahnogood/?action=view¤t=oinkbar.jpg
Next thing I knew, there was a fatwa against me.
November 28th, 2006 at 6:14 pm
How the hell did filthy allah worm his way into the comments of this post? Jeez.
November 28th, 2006 at 11:46 pm
My bad. See, metaphors are dangerous…
November 29th, 2006 at 7:00 am
Two comments:
With regard to the “allah” nonsense… YEAH! What you said.
And, yeah, Mike Silence was right and wrong, sorta. Yes, it was a great little story and no it wasn’t an over-analysis.
The Missus was right on time. The little one’s need a tactile foundation, piggy banks or teddy bears, whatever.
Think about it this way. You’re moving and your wife did you a favor and packed your wallet and tax returns and bank account data into one of those many boxes. (What the …!?)
Would you be happy?
Whatcha bet Mom knows precisely where her purse is.
It’s a cinch that the little knows where his quarters are.
Good luck in the move.
November 29th, 2006 at 10:11 am
Hmmm, maybe it is YOU who is actually having the trouble emotionally with moving into the new house, and therefore, the discomfort you saw in Preston, Jr., was an extension of the anxiety that you, yourself is feeling?
Sorry, you are right. Sometimes a piggy bank is just a piggy bank.
Good luck with the move. I know how awful they can be!!
November 29th, 2006 at 8:20 pm
heh, leave it to momma.
November 30th, 2006 at 1:20 am
Ah, life was so simple when we couldn’t think in the abstract.