The Twelve Days of Christmas – DAY THREE
December 16th, 2006 at 8:30 am by Preston Taylor Holmes**Since I’ve been such a crap blogger lately, and since Cranky, Smantix and annika have been keeping this place rocking while I’ve been tending to real life™, I figure it couldn’t hurt to bring back some of the classics from last year’s Twelve Days of Christmas Gift Ideas for Liberals Campaign. From now until Christmas, I’ll be pulling some of these out in an effort to hoodwink those of you who weren’t regular readers last year, and to hopefully amuse some of you who remember the originals. – PTH **
Continuing in the Ramahanakwanzmas tradition, Six Meat Buffet brings you Day Three of our 12 Days of Christmas: Last Minute Gift Ideas for Liberals campaign.
Today’s gift: STRATEGO FOR DEMOCRATS!
Sure, you played it as a kid – hell, if you’re enough of a geek, you’ve probably played it as an adult. Line up your army to take on the opposing army and capture their flag, leaving a trail of bloodshed in your wake.
Well, we’ve got the new Stratego for Democrats – fight the War on Terror in the Dim-O-Crack tradition of undercutting, faux “supporting the troops” and a turncoat mainstream press! It worked in Vietnam, it can work in the War on Terror!
When you play traditional Stratego, do you furrow your brow at where to place your high ranking officers? Do you gnash your teeth over how best to protect your flag? Stratego for Democrats relieves you of these worries.
Just like congressional Dim-O-Cracks work in consort with the mainstream press to tie our troops hands in combat, your hands are tied from the very beginning with Stratego for Democrats! All you’ve got are low ranking game pieces and a lot of white flags that you’ve got no way to protect.
And that leaves you wide open, since the enemy in the War on Terror is an ever changing mix of goat-raping islamofascists who hide behind women and use children as human shields. You’re going to have a hell of a time getting through the car bombs on your way to capture their non-existent flag. In other words, you better hope you get the blue team because this war is unwinnable.
So this Christmas, have your own war, the Dim-O-Crack way. Get Stratego for Democrats. Rooting against the home team is always fun, but losing a war has never been this much fun – or this fulfilling! Wage peace and raise the white flag over and over again with your friends. It’s the gift that keeps on giving, all year long!
Fun for the whole family – right up until the beheading!
If this made you laugh, don’t you think you should go and vote for us for Best Humor Blog? As Wilfred Brimley once so wisely said, “It’s the right thing to do.” Plus you could help us catch Steve from Hog on Ice! Only 3 days left!
PREVIOUSLY:
December 13th, 2005 at 9:07 am
[...] Six Meat Buffet » The Twelve Days of Christmas – DAY THREE [...]
December 13th, 2005 at 9:21 am
You had me at: The idea that I’m going to win this Stratego battle is just plain wrong.
December 13th, 2005 at 9:23 am
[...] Preston over at Six Meat Buffet is doing a twelve days of Christmas series. Today he offers up his third suggestion for Christmas gifts for your Democrat friends. Today Preston offers STRATEGO FOR DEMOCRATS! Full Post Here [...]
December 13th, 2005 at 9:55 am
STRATEGO FOR LIBERALS
A Six Meat Buffet creation: It’s the perfect moonbat Christmas gift!…
December 13th, 2005 at 10:02 am
What a loverly way to start the day – making fun of the moonbats!:mrgreen:
Thanks for the yucks!:lol:
December 13th, 2005 at 10:20 am
Awesome. Just awesome.
December 13th, 2005 at 10:28 am
by far the best day yet.
December 13th, 2005 at 10:29 am
[...] I have not started shopping for Christmas yet nor do I know what I’m getting for everyone, but I’m not sure I’ll buy Stratego for Democrats. It’s not the message I’d like to send to family and friends, and I’ve never even played regular Stratego. [...]
December 13th, 2005 at 10:32 am
For That Hard To Shop For Liberal Friend
Michelle Malkin has linked this ‘game’ with Six Meat Buffet. A great gift for that hard to buy for liberal friend!
…
December 13th, 2005 at 10:54 am
I thought the higher numbers beat the lower numbers. In that case, red does have a small chance, because he has 25 pieces above 8 whereas all of the blue are below 2. However, since there are no “3″ bomb defusers, that means the blue could make a straight line of car bombs, and never lose… So, I guess my point is moot.
December 13th, 2005 at 11:03 am
Gift Ideas For Liberals
Preston Taylor Holmes over at Six Meat Buffet has an excellent gift idea for all your Democrat friends his holiday season:
Click here for more information.
…
December 13th, 2005 at 11:07 am
Really good! Made me think of a “liberal” version of the game ‘Risk’, but instead of “a game of global domination,” how about a game where everything is handed to you, the strategy is how quickly you can retreat and lose it all.
Link
December 13th, 2005 at 11:24 am
Brilliant!
December 13th, 2005 at 11:42 am
Quick Links
*** Beautiful Atrocities’ Essential Guide to Meth: As Napa is to Chardonnay, the Central Valley is to meth, turning out a product with E-cup personality & a caustic yet delicate bouquet with flavors of battery acid, lighter fluid, Maximum Strength…
December 13th, 2005 at 12:21 pm
Actually, Gap, the lower the number, the higher the rank. Which is why John al-Querry got an 11. And I don’t think such a number exists in the actual game.
December 13th, 2005 at 12:32 pm
Solstice Gifts for that hard-to-shop-for-liberal on your list
From the Six Meat Buffet Christmas Guide: The pshops of the individual pieces are simply priceless….
December 13th, 2005 at 12:38 pm
Very funny, you got my vote! So tell me, which one of you is Cox and which one is Forkum?
December 13th, 2005 at 12:45 pm
Preston is “CoXXX.”
Take my word for it. ROWR.
This post is frickin’ hilarious. I want to play so I can have the Islamofascists shoe-bomb Nancy Pelosi. Where do I buy??????
December 13th, 2005 at 12:50 pm
Liberal Stratego
My favorite strategy is to hide my white flags behind a wall made up of Understanding pieces and Nuance pieces….
December 13th, 2005 at 1:20 pm
The Stratego set is brilliant! Well done indeed.
December 13th, 2005 at 1:47 pm
Stratego for Democrats
It’s fun for the whole family…right up until the beheading!…
December 13th, 2005 at 2:45 pm
Gap, some of them are funny, most of them are just stupid. I’ve let a lot of idiots get on here lately and spout off but I think my patience has run out.
There’s only so much Bushitler farce you can laugh at until it gets old.
Plus it’s much more fun for me to read their angry comments after they’ve been blacklisted and really let the shit fly.
December 13th, 2005 at 2:46 pm
See, I don’t know that you’re correct about the numbers. The number that has the most is 2 which is the scout– anyone can beat them but they have the most range of motion. The highest is 10– 10 and 9 being high and there are only one of them. The S or Spy is the only one that can defeat the 10. This is at least the rules on any game of Stratego I’ve ever played. However, I’m playing a newer board, and a quick Yahoo search reveals boards that are setup the way you suggest and the way I’ve played– no one’s wrong!
I love the idea, though. Having multiple flags is great parody of liberal philosophy!
December 13th, 2005 at 2:47 pm
I should be on your site. Your flabby floor needs to be whipped into shape.
December 13th, 2005 at 2:56 pm
That last one amuses me, so it’s staying. Otherwise, we’re shutting these things down until the motherfarkers go away.
December 13th, 2005 at 3:15 pm
Christmas Gifts for the Leftist who has everything
Still looking for the Christmas/Kwaanza/Festivus Gift for the Bush Hating Leftist, well look no further than here
December 13th, 2005 at 5:09 pm
Surrender Now and Avoid the Christmas Rush
Six Meat Buffet presents the must-have Secular-Late-December gift of 2005: Stratego for Democrats.Sure, you played it as a kid – hell, if you’re enough of a geek, you’ve probably played it as an adult. Line up your army to take
December 13th, 2005 at 5:50 pm
[...] Stratego For Democrats: The perfect gift for every libby on your list. [...]
December 13th, 2005 at 7:20 pm
The Perfect Chanukah Present for DovBear
Six Meat Buffet has the perfect present for all your favorite liberals. Today, he’s showcasing Stratego for Democrats!
December 13th, 2005 at 8:41 pm
Recreating “Siege & Capture” And Stratego
Back in 1997 I did the graphics and programmed, from scratch in Notepad, a Windows 95 Internet based playable version of Stratego. Dubbed Siege & Capture it went on to win a Golden Calf award from http://www.tucows.com for best Windows…
December 13th, 2005 at 9:30 pm
Strategero
Hat tip to Michelle Malkin for passing on the below works by Six Meat Buffet. Perhaps Six Meat Buffet will produce it and and sell it! buy it now and give it to you favorite leftist for the Holiday present. BTW, you really need to check out Six Meat …
December 13th, 2005 at 9:33 pm
RtR Reality Edition
Later today…………………. Arnold’s Post Tookie Nap Response Batter up! Whatever happened to Al TV? Happy Birthday! I think it is time to Drop The Hammer on these members of the ROP. Twelve days of Christmas……..Day Three…
December 14th, 2005 at 6:04 am
Daily News for December 14, 2005
Foreign Abbas-Linked Group Tries To Kill Sharon. Al Aqsa Fires Rocket At PM’s Ranch In Hopes Of Taking Out Israeli…
December 14th, 2005 at 11:28 am
Gift Idea of Dems
Stumped on what to buy for Democrats on your Christmas shopping list? Six Meat Buffet has just the ticket: Stratego for Democrats: When you play traditional Stratego, do you furrow your brow at where to place your high ranking officers?…
December 14th, 2005 at 12:52 pm
[...] Well, just in time for the holidays, Stratego for Democrats has been released! [...]
December 14th, 2005 at 1:58 pm
Gift idea for Democrats
Are you still scratching your head over what to buy your Kos-reading friends or relatives? Six Meat Buffet has the perfect gift idea for the Democrats on your list: Stratego for Democrats!
When you’re done laughing (or grimacing), go vote for Pres…
December 14th, 2005 at 11:59 pm
Christmas Gift for Donks!
STRATEGO FOR DHIMMICRATS! I stumbled across this on S.D.P., and thought it worth passing along. This is truly an idea whose time has come!…
December 15th, 2005 at 1:54 pm
The beauty of this game is that Liberals can play by themselves. They will be, I’m sure, very good at this game, after all, they play with themselves all the time.
December 16th, 2005 at 2:52 pm
There’s no war to fight! Wouldn’t the LIEberal traitors and the goathumping Islamocrats be on the same side?
May 16th, 2006 at 9:50 am
Gift Idea for Dems…
Stumped on what to buy for Democrats on your Christmas shopping list? Six Meat Buffet has just the ticket: Stratego for Democrats: When you play traditional Stratego, do you furrow your brow at where to place your high ranking officers?……