Don’t Let Global Warming Kill You!
February 25th, 2007 at 8:37 pm by CrankyDear friend,
I write this urgent appeal on the eve of Al Gore’s Inconvenient Truth receiving critical acclamation.
Global Warming has caused devastating storms across Southeastern Pennsylvania and the world. Countless oxygen producing trees have been destroyed and its up to us to make a difference.
Dear friend, won’t you please consider a generous contribution to combat Global Warming?
Your gift of $3.00 will buy 50 lbs. of potting soil.
$12.00 buys a lovely dwarf pear tree for the north side of my wooded back yard.
$150.00 will help me finish the oxygen generating toad pond that I need to finish this Spring.
Don’t fret that you drive your gas-consuming Jetta, give money, it will make you feel betta!
And thank you for your concern about saving the planet.
UPDATE:
Since you people obviously don’t give a rip about the environment ($0 to date), maybe you’ll care about attaining salvation. You even get a prize for donating.
February 25th, 2007 at 9:22 pm
I get 10%. No, 15%. And I’m doing you a favor.
February 25th, 2007 at 9:24 pm
I don’t trust Paypal. Is it OK if I just get in my Hummer and drive cross-country and give you a big bag of sh…er…fertilizer?
February 25th, 2007 at 9:32 pm
You’re insane! That button actually works. But where do you get 50lbs of potting soil for $3.00? Can I get in on that deal?
February 25th, 2007 at 11:29 pm
But where do you get 50lbs of potting soil for $3.00?
Maybe I’m thinking of topsoil, which sells for $20/cu. yd. Either way, you’re going to die unless you purchase carbon offsets.
Might as well be me. I’ll really use it to plant trees ‘n’ stuff.
Do it for the children!
My children.
February 25th, 2007 at 11:40 pm
Ha! In your face, you ignorant hicks!
The Prophet Gore (PBUH) was honored by Hollywood tonight with his Academy Award.
OK, so HE didn’t really win it, but the award was validation of his global warming theory (something he invented around the same time he invented the internets).
Because let’s face it. The truth of the world lies in Hollywood. And no, that last sentence was not a pun.
February 26th, 2007 at 12:27 am
Anyone catch that AlHole’s acceptance speech tonight? Here’s a transcript:
http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=1096
Oh…Felonius, you suck.
February 26th, 2007 at 6:26 pm
On top of all of that…just saw this break on Drudge…on Hot Air too:
http://hotair.com/archives/2007/02/26/inconvenient-als-mansion-consumes-20x-more-energy-than-average-household/
So I guess if you are rich enough to purchase “offsets”, you can be a big frickin’ hypocrite and use all the energy you want.
I hope Al slips around his house and that Oscar becomes “inconveniently” imbedded up his ass…
February 27th, 2007 at 5:38 am
I’m doing my part. I bought an air conditioner that we run on high, but we turn it around so it cools the outside!
No need to thank me. Just doing what we can to help out.
February 27th, 2007 at 10:30 am
I am not in agreement with your trying to fix global warming. I live in Connecticut and am working hard to warm the freaking place up! Quit trying to ruin my plans!
February 27th, 2007 at 11:05 am
Kevin, you are a good man. Whattaya say we take our Hummers out this weekend and run over some hybrids?
February 28th, 2007 at 8:21 pm
OK, “Goredon”…I did my part.
I expect my contribution to go towards that toad pond…and a toad to be named for me.
Now send me my freakin’ bumper-sticker.
March 4th, 2007 at 6:01 pm
Annika’s Journal Now Selling Carbon Offsets…
[What the hell is a carbon offset?] SAVE THE WORLD!!! Buy carbon offsets from me. Even though I don’t know what a carbon offset is, I know a moneymaker when I see one. You, guilt ridden Annika’s Journal reader that……