It didn’t take long for Ashland City’s prodigal daughter to get back to her anti-American, troop hating ways:

Shutting It Down As I Type

Posted by brittneygilbert

If you hurry you can catch the waterboarding demonstration going on right now in Berkeley at the Marines Recruiting station. Via Indy Bay:
COME SHUT DOWN THE BERKELEY MARINE RECRUITING CENTER
Make “Truth in advertising” posters that expose the lies that the recruiters are telling the youth in order to get them to kill and die for oil and empire… and bring them!

Woohoo! Maybe afterwards you can go out to eat with Code Pink. Out to eat, eat out – six of one, half a dozen of the other.

While delighting in such traitor talk can make for good controversy down here in the sticks, out on the Left Coast it just means you’re the same as everybody else. Go ahead and renounce ever coming back now so you can regale the hippie folk with the backwards ways and tales of intolerance from Lower Crackerstan.

Those from these parts will recall when local talker Steve Gill humiliated her and her paleo-con (yet somehow Democrat voting) liege after they referred to the troops as mafia hitmen. I think you’ve found your niche, sweetie.

Where’s a murderous Iraqi hobo vet when you need one?

Huckles got the Code Pink treatment in San Fran today as well. Showcasing, yet again, why he just doesn’t have what it takes:

Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee was heckled by protestors during a speech in San Francisco Thursday.

Members of the anti-war group Code Pink shouted down the former Arkansas governor during an address before the Commonwealth Club. They were eventually hustled out of the Fairmont Hotel ballroom, but the affable, engaging Huckabee took note of the disruption.“The beauty of America is that a person can come and even make a disruption, and you know what, that person is not going to be taken out and shot.”

Fraternizing with South American dictators, trying to smear fake blood on the Secretary of State, taunting soldiers recovering at Walter Reed, and trying to kick Marines out of a US city – you’ve got it, Huckles!  They are the beauty of America.

This one would be hilarious if I didn’t know that this over-stuffed vanful of illegals would have probably smashed into some other innocent motorists if they hadn’t rammed an official Homeland Security SUV. Then again, the SUV deserved it, because, well, it’s an evil SUV.

One has to wonder if there were empty bottles of tequila rolling around the floorboard of the over-stuffed Hispanic Mystery Machine. Surely not.

President Junior was quick to send a personal handwritten apology to the illegals, and included a cash advance on their soon-to-come tax rebate checks. Compassionate conservatism.

h/t yet again to MB

Last year, Sanjum Paul Singh Samagh was denied entrance to a local OC bar because he refused to remove his hair-conditioning wrap. The good news is that now after a boycott organzied by his classmates, the bar has changed it’s policy and Sanjum can now now freely boogie-down until the break of dawn with drunken, scantily-clad, women.

Obviously, he’s religion is quite sacred to him and his dedication to his headdress is quite admirable. I don’t know much about Sikhism, but I wonder what the religion states about hanging around late-night drinking establishments trying to pick up on easy prey?

Here is the fiscal responsibility heartthrob on Fox News giving too much praise for Bush’s half-hearted no-more-earmarks-next-time-because-I-won’t-be-in-office executive order.

The more I thing about the circus that is the presidential race, the more I think that what we really should be watching are Senate and House races. These are the folks that actually pass laws and make budgets.

TAKE THAT, CONSERVATIVES!

The left is getting exactly what it wants this election year… well, maybe with the exception of that little nasty race/gender war that they’re trying to keep a lid on over in Dim-O-Crack land. They’ve been pushing hard to get their boy McCain the GOP (RIP) nomination, and it looks like they may have succeeded.

McCain’s Sunshine State support came from the elderly (always a reliable conservative base), independents (i.e. Democrats crossing over to vote in the GOP primary to give Mac an little boost), moderates (i.e. country club republicans who need somebody to pick their lettuce), and, of course, Hispanics (i.e. la raza).

McCain is the perfect GOP encore to President Junior. The only issue either one of them has right is the war on terror. But just watch as the rightosphere falls in line behind the candidate that the leftist establishment has worked to put in place. And, ironically, the very same Maverick who as been shitting in the mouth of the conservative base and telling them it’s a hot fudge sundae. With nuts. Not Ron Paul nuts, but nuts enough.

And times is tough this year, since any of these guys will be fairly easy prey for Obama Hussein and his Oprah Army™ to beat, especially since the electorate gets 4-years-dumber every Presidential election cycle. Yeah, I’m a little bitter.

The only actual straight talk to come from the Straight Talk Express this primary season has been this Freudian slip from La Raza McCain backer Mel Martinez…

I saw this on Fox last night and thought I was hearing things. Thanks, youtube! I, for one, would like to welcome our new Mexican overlords by spending the next 9 months brushing up on my Spanish and converting my dollars to pesos since the peso will be more valuable come November.

As our country spirals down the sewer that the great unwashed continue to vote us into, I believe my friend Leo may have hit on something with his new Pledge of Dependence.

Sure it’s not the Black Pledge or Hitlery’s Pledge of Allegience to the America That Can Be (with enough help from Government), but it’s certainly where we’re headed with this crop of candidates.

I realize this violates the spirit, wholesome family atmosphere, and dress code of what we try to promote here at the Buffet but Al Sharpton telling Bill Clinton to shut up reminded me of Eddie Murphy’s old “suck my dick, Masta” riff:

Not safe for work, the pigmentationally challenged, those who faint at a certain n-word, the s-word, the f-word, the mf-word, jokes about slavery, dated 80s leather pantsuits, or those unfamiliar with Eddie Murphy before he became the voice of the donkey in your kid’s favorite movie.But if you’re ok with “suck my dick”, you’re ok with me.

(and thanks for fixing my HTFL)

Don’t call me after I’ve had several margaritas at Casa Don Gallo.

To wit:

Dear Fred,

It’s been almost a week since we’ve talked. It seems like just yesterday we were experiencing the ups and downs of that rollercoaster ride on the way to the Presidency. Eatin’ funnel cake. Getting sick on the Tilt-A-Whirl. Admiring the unbowing tenacity of your Prescription Strength Super Poli-Grip denture cream as you tried to eat that candied apple.

We punched the hippie so we’d both have enough tickets to get on the Gravitron but when we turned around – you were gone.

And now we’re getting The Silent Treatment. I thought we had something.
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Yes friends, I’ve cracked the DaVinci code that Disney uses to turn my children from adorable pre-teens into a multi-billion dollar demographic!

For no money down, I’m willing to share this with you!

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It came out yesterday but it’s new to me. Sadly, the chefs of political correctness across the pond have cranked up the temperature in their crock pot of tolerance and boiled British Bulldog is this evening’s entree. Mark Steyn sips deeply from Julia Childs’ apéritif and stuffs yellow-bellied lobsterbacks into a sausage casing delivered fresh to your table:

First They Came for Piglet
Excessive deference to Islam.

By Mark Steyn

My favorite headline of the year so far comes from The Daily Mail in Britain: “Government Renames Islamic Terrorism As ‘Anti-Islamic Activity’ To Woo Muslims.”

[...]

Well, yes, one sort of sees what she means. Killing thousands of people in Manhattan skyscrapers in the name of Islam does, among a certain narrow-minded type of person, give Islam a bad name, and thus could be said to be “anti-Islamic” — in the same way that the Luftwaffe raining down death and destruction on Londoners during the Blitz was an “anti-German activity.”
[...]
Still, it should add a certain surreal quality to BBC news bulletins: “The Prime Minister today condemned the latest anti-Islamic activity as he picked through the rubble of Downing Street looking for his 2008 Wahhabi Community Outreach Award. In a related incident, the anti-Islamic activists who blew up Buckingham Palace have unfortunately caused the postponement of the Queen’s annual Ramadan banquet.”

Political correctness is the disease and Mark Steyn is the cure. Make sure you’re up to date on your inoculations:

This is now a recurring theme in British life. A while back, it was a local government council telling workers not to have knick-knacks on their desks representing Winnie-the-Pooh’s porcine sidekick, Piglet. As Martin Niemöller famously said, first they came for Piglet and I did not speak out because I was not a Disney character and, if I was, I’m more of an Eeyore. So then they came for the Three Little Pigs, and Babe, and by the time I realized my country had turned into a 24/7 Looney Tunes it was too late, because there was no Porky Pig to stammer “Th-th-th-that’s all, folks!” and bring the nightmare to an end.

Can puppy crockpot give puppy blender a run for it’s money?

Apologies to any Who fans but the donk S.C. primary has turned into a middle-aged wasteland and Bubba Christ’s Second Coming was about as well-received as Sherman’s first:

Said Bill Clinton today in Columbia, SC: “Jesse Jackson won South Carolina in ’84 and ’88. Jackson ran a good campaign. And Obama ran a good campaign here.”

So what are you blithely attempting to imply there, Billy Jeff? That Obama won’t be the 2nd black president because Democrats won’t elect him because of his skin color? And poor Hillary. Spanked 2-to-1 by a lightweight whose policy proposals are about as thin as her own skin.

South Carolina is a turning point make no mistake. If past is prologue then it is going to be an ugly turn for the worst.  Hillary ain’t going down without a fight.  Hell, if Hillary had practice going down we wouldn’t know the name Lewinsky in the first place.  She cannot win with the militant lesbian vote alone.  That’s neither here nor there, oh lovers of strong women everywhere.

This is Mama’s Time though and she will marshal every leaky NYT/LAT media assassin, obedient black pastor, and black Congress member to turn the fire hoses on B-HO so she can appear magnanimous and above the fray.

Now’s when the fun part starts. Expect those dogs to be loosed on the Sunday talks in the morning as to jump out ahead of this historic beatdown and to downplay its importance as the permanent campaign soldiers on.

I will concede that The Thompson Betrayal has had me in the doldrums but I absolutely love what the Donks are doing. Thanks for keeping my spirits up guys, gals, and those in between.

Vignettes from the Obama victory speech:

“Change won here tonight. The change just keeps on changing. And we’ve got to change to meet that change. Changing the face of the future. But if we want change for the better we must change what we’ve done in the past. Change we can believe in. Change for the world of tomorrow. Changing to change the present. Change will be all that’s left in your pockets when I’m done. Change.”

Meow.

As if the global recession, rising fuel prices, and the forthcoming Darfur World Racism Pogrom weren’t enough, the looming oceanographic gang war threatens to keep our nation’s shorelines awash in blood this summer. Break yourself, fool:

Film taken of gangs of dolphins repeatedly ramming baby porpoises, tossing them in the air and pursuing them to the death has solved a long-term mystery of what causes the death of so many of these harmless mammals – but has left animal experts baffled as to the motive.

[...]

Another mystery is that the animal ‘murders’ have only been reported in two parts of the world - along Scotland’s East Coast and in America off the beaches of Virginia…

It’s obvious to this observer that the Out-Of-Stream Media (OSM) will ignore the abundant evidence (like they always do to push their narrative) that the CIA has been distributing rock cocaine to the Aqua-American community to fund their clandestine war against the mudskipper. I mean when was the last time you saw a positive aquatic role model on television? Think about it.

Couple this with man’s gentrification of our coastal waterways and the ensuing turf war that is likely fueling this most recent spike in mammal-on-mammal mayhem and we’re crossing into genocide territory.

The two groups of biologists pooled information and, at first, it was believed the mammals had died through ‘blast trauma’. In American cases, this was supposedly from exercises by the US Navy, and in Scotland from air guns used by oil rig technicians to detect undersea caverns.

This theory was dismissed after further examination of the mammals’ bodies revealed the injuries – broken ribs, imploding lungs, damaged livers and massive internal bleeding – could only have come from prolonged, focused attacks.

Like Guantanamo.

‘Blast Trauma’ Caught On Tape: Straight highsidin’, yo

A likely excuse. Everybody who reads the news knows that our military produces murderous hobos. How can we rule out the possibility that they don’t engage in “sail-bys” and swing out the ass-end of their Humvees to run over dolphins? I’m not ruling anything out with this bunch.

Marine experts now believe that these displays of attacks on non-rival, non-predatory, peace-loving porpoises and, more shockingly, of dolphin infanticide, may have always taken place.

It is only now, with dolphins’ more human-friendly behaviour taking them closer to tourist boats and beaches, that the violence is being witnessed first hand. Until the shocking realisation, dolphin-watchers in America had believed they were watching the mammals at play with their young.

For Christ’s sake. Does Our Way ™ have to be everybody’s way? Embrace a little diversity here, people. What right does our government or our “marine experts” have to tell this aggrieved minority how to raise their children?

“It was, Oh my God!, the animals I’ve been studying for the last 10 years are killing these porpoises.”

Theories abound on the reason behind the mammal murders. These have included territorial clashes and feuds over food resources. But food is not in short supply and the victims are not just chased away but pursued to the death.

[...]

But as the experts of the Cetacean Research and Rescue Unit are forced to declare: “These killings represent yet another example of the hard brutality and evolutionary pressures of the marine world.”

Word.

Tiberius “Squeaky” Jefferson of the Reef Side Rollin’ 60s – honorably discharged former lieutenant of the 101st Aquaborne and recipient of the Coral Cross for Valor.

Nobody’s got the guts to mention it – not even the NY Times – but I will: In all likelihood, these dolphins are our veterans too. Let down by the Bush Administration and their handling of the war and Hurricane Katrina.

1.20.09 – eyes on the prize.

When I was a kid, I would marvel over artist renderings of what the future would be like. Jetpacks. Jetsonsesque space gadgetry. Flying cars.

Well, at least we have the flying cars.

h/t MB

The first is Sunny Lucas. Part of her platform….

And that’s just part of the glorious platform. The rest of it is just as brilliant. I think I just messed myself. I’ll be right back.

Okay, I’m back.

Second but not least, this guy.

Slicing through terrorists and economic turbulence like a hammer.

h/t M.B.

If it weren’t so easy to predict, I’d say that I had extra sensationary perceptions. President Junior and his Kongressional Kronies are close to deal to hand free money out to the unwashed masses.

Fantastic. The free market begins to correct itself as the irresponsible lending bubble bursts and the Feds start playing a shell game to interfere with a painful – yet necessary – correction. In addition, they’re going to give away money in exchange for votes and call it a “stimulus package”.

This is what our Federal government has come to. It’s gone so far beyond its original design that all hope is very close to being lost. It’s an absolute embarrassment and both parties are equally to blame.

I was prepared to give Junior a break and say that he was the 2nd or 3rd worst president in modern history, but he’s moving ever closer to a tie with Dhimmi Carter. It’s going to be a photo finish.

UPDATE: Confirmed. Let the handouts begin.

“The hoary doctrines of Anglo-American civil asset forfeiture law that have been resurrected like some jurisprudential Frankenstein monster, from the dark recesses of past centuries.”
[...]
“In my view, a drug ‘war’ has been perverted too often into a series of frontal attacks on basic American constitutional guarantees – including due process, the presumption of innocence, and…unrelenting government assaults on property rights, fueled by a dangerous and emotional vigilante mentality that sanctions shredding the U.S. Constitution into meaningless confetti.” Henry Hyde, Forfeiting Our Property Rights: Is Your Property Safe From Seizure?

That’s a great quote from Henry Hyde regarding the outright abuse of power by police departments and prosecutors in leveraging asset forfeiture as a punishment of first resort against innocent and guilty citizens alike when it comes to drug crimes. To begin, how do you defend yourself when everything you are worth is taken from you?

In a perfect world, there are little angels on the shoulders of the S.W.A.T. team when their guns are drawn and your property happens to be worth a lot of money that can conveniently be auctioned off and placed in their budget. But sometimes those angels get stuck in traffic.

Naturally, I was perplexed today when I heard that everyone’s 2nd 3rd 4th 5th 6th favorite state legislator, Doug Jackson (D – Dickson), is introducing a law that encourages asset forfeiture if dog fights take place on your property. Finally, someone taking a stand on the tough issues. And he’ll give the money from the auctioned assets to animal shelters. He cited asset forfeiture for drug crimes as the logical progression for extending that punishment to other crimes.

A real life Hillbilly Robin Hood. (more…)

Well, this latest study provides more ammunition for those maniacal leftists who insist that President Bush purposely mislead us lemmings into supporting his immoral and illegal war on the peace-loving Saddam Hussein.

The obvious bias in the “research” is quite comical actually.

Even though evidence has shown that the intelligence gathered (by agencies of many countries) has proven to have been faulty, nowhere in the article in this mentioned. The implication here is that President Bush knew that the data he had been given was not factual and purposefully lied to American citizens and world leaders. I know, what’s new?

I’m sure as the election gets closer, many more “studies” that paint Republicans as war-mongering, angels-of-death will begin to dot the media landscape.

Argh.

Fred Thompson has dropped his bid for the Presidency.

Am I really supposed to get excited over Romney or McCain?

Let me just say that I am loving tonight’s Demagogue Democrat debate. Loving it.

Obama comments that he doesn’t know which Clinton he’s running against and that while he was praising Reagan for making pretty speeches that brought people together against their common interest – that she was a Corporate Attorney for Wal-Mart.

As they say, in the parlance of our time…..it’s on.Hillary hits back on Obama running a Sopranos-esque slumlord influence peddling scheme. Which may very well be correct, btw.

Silky plays the race card and say the subprime mortgages are intentionally going after black people because of institutional racism from slavery. Predatory lending practices are kicking black people out of their homes.

More drunken liveblogging after the jump!
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“Dad, I want to be a CIA ninja.”

This from my gun-toting princess.

Interestingly, a quick inspection of the CIA site shows no such position exists. This makes her all the more convinced that they have such a program.

More gems to be found in the rubbish of the Junkyard.

The lastest P.J. O’Rourke book isn’t technically one of his books. It is called P. J. O’Rourke on The Wealth of Nations and is hopefully the first installment of a series of commentaries called “Books That Changed the World”.

Modern authors, so the idea goes, will be matched up with classic works and authors to create a thinking man’s Cliff’s Notes.

All that said, here is why this is a fantastic read.

Useful information to those who think history began in 1968.

The commentary goes on to say how it was commerce that first led to the concept of freedom that we understand today. Traders formed primitive corporations which would handle paying rents to lords and landholders. Lords loved getting the rents without having to interfere in the day to day businesses and the messy task of collections. This left them plenty of free time to pursue their pleasures.

The traders and producer, being free to trade and produce began to become wealthy.

Continuing on with the nature of medieval lords (and what appears to be celebrities):

To which P. J. masterfully summarizes:

Ladies and gentlemen – we regret to inform you that Tom Cruise will not be joining us for the remainder of life’s movie:

“SP’s. They’ll read about those in history books one day…”

“I‘d like to go on vacation. And go and romp. And play. And just do it. You know what I mean? I mean, that’s what I want it to be. Ok? Thats how and there’s times I’d like to ….I…can’t. Because – I know. I know. So. I-uh-….you know what you know I have to do something about it. It’s not – you know you can sit here wish it was different and then you look at it and – you go “ok this is it” – and (unintelligible) you know? I have to do something don’t I? Yep. I have to do it because I can’t live with myself if I don’t. And that really is it. I don’t care if someone thinks it’s hard or easy you’re either helping and contributing everything you can or you’re not. Ok? Because I’m carrying my load. Alright? And as much as I’m carrying I still feel like I gotta do more.

You can just see the look in their eyes and you know who are the ones that are doing it. And you know the spectators. Who are the ones who are going “well it’s easy for you” or “what am I doing“? And it’s just that thing is – I canceled that in my area. Hehehehe..and man, you’re either in or you’re out. That spectatorism is it’s something that thing that we have no time for it now. So it’s our responsibility to educate and create the new reality.”

Huh?

Please return your seats to the upright position, burn that old VHS of “Risky Business”, and refrain from coming into contact with any “SP’s” while practicing “KSW”. If you have any questions regarding “LRH” please refer to your user manual.

Eep. Opp. Ork. Ah. Ah. In retrospect, Jet Screamer may have been an early L. Ron Hubbard adherent.
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