The first ten bills of our new Socialist congress are out. It’s everything you might have hoped it would be. If you order in the next 20 minutes, you get…
More handouts and useless government jobs!
S.1 — American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009. “To create jobs, restore economic growth, and strengthen America’s middle class through measures that modernize the nation’s infrastructure, enhance America’s energy independence, expand educational opportunities, preserve and improve affordable health care, provide tax relief, and protect those in greatest need, and for other purposes.”
Expanded union influence and wealth re-distribution! It worked for the UAW, let’s do more!
S.2 — Middle Class Opportunity Act of 2009. Sound familiar? This is a retread of a bill sponsored by Senator Chuck Schumer in the last Congress that has a variety of tax reform goals; the additional descriptions in this bill include hints at union support (”ensuring workers can exercise their rights to freely choose to form a union without employer interference”) and perhaps another go at the Ledbetter law (”removing barriers to fair pay for all workers”).
Bought too much house? Living way outside your means? Don’t sweat it. The rest of us will pay your bills, by force of course, courtesy of the loving Feds.
S.3 — Homeowner Protection and Wall Street Accountability Act of 2009. This bill will include a moratorium on foreclosures, Senator Dick Durbin’s plan to allow for easier reworking of troubled mortgages by bankruptcy judges, new regulations for the credit card and financial industry, and investment in the Small Business Administration to provide loans for small businesses in need.
Socialized medicine! Tired of inconveniences like freedom of choice and personal responsibility when it comes to healthcare? Let the Feds handle it for you. Here’s your card, you’ll get your office visit in 2011.
S.4 — Comprehensive Health Reform Act of 2009. “It is the sense of Congress that Congress should enact, and the President should sign, legislation to guarantee health coverage, improve health care quality and disease prevention, and reduce health care costs for all Americans and the health care system.”
Crippling restrictions on industry! Act now and maybe the myth of global warming can cost you your job in 2009!
S.5 — Cleaner, Greener, and Smarter Act of 2009. This is a bill that focuses mainly on green investment and updating infrastructure to be more efficient and less polluting. But since a lot of those priorities are expected to be rolled into the stimulus package, one wonders if this is a vehicle for cap-and-trade and the Kyoto Protocols, given this provision: “requiring reductions in emissions of greenhouse gases in the United States and achieving reductions in emissions of greenhouse gases abroad.”
If you loved “No Child Left Behind”, you’ll love this new pile of shit! The Feds once again prove that they have no business in the realm of education. They’ve teamed up with the teachers’ unions to destroy K-12 and now they’re going to pay your college tuition. Just remember, health care and college are human rights in today’s Amerika.
S.7 — Education Opportunity Act of 2009. “To expand educational opportunities for all Americans by increasing access to high-quality early childhood education and after school programs, advancing reform in elementary and secondary education, strengthening mathematics and science instruction, and ensuring that higher education is more affordable.” An education omnibus bill that will no doubt be split up into separate pieces of legislation.
Rolling back the late-term regulations and legislation from the last administration. Let’s say, everything from about January 2001 through January 2009.
S.8 — Returning Government to the American People Act. “To return the Government to the people by reviewing controversial ‘midnight regulations’ issued in the waning days of the Bush Administration.” A sentiment we can all get behind, which promises to provide the new administration legislative authority, if it doesn’t have it already, to review (and presumably deny) the last administration’s late regulations.
Nothing says fiscal responsibility like spending trillions and trillions on new handouts, new un-necessary government jobs and destroying small and medium-sized businesses, which are the only entities that can actually help expand the taxpayer base and increase revenue to the Federal budget. Oh yeah, and wealth redistribution! Fiscal responsibility = equality of standards-of-living, regardless of personal effort or achievement.
S.10 — Fiscal Responsibility Act of 2009. Gosh, this one is interesting. It’s one part congressional hand-wringing over the fact that “the Federal budget is on an unsustainable path of rising deficits and debt,” and it calls for a study of this. It’s one part fiscal hawkery, supporting “strong pay-as-you-go rules, to help block the approval of measures that would increase the deficit.” And it’s one part … populist? “A review of the current system of taxation of the United States to ensure that burdens are borne fairly and equitably.” That could be the justification for the Bush tax cut rollback in 2010.
I’m so excited I could crap my pants. And with Tennessee’s tough-guy Senators leading the way, I’m not confident that the GOP will be doing much fighting back. They’ve laid down like cheap hookers for the Donks for the last decade-plus, why should we expect backbone now? Prove me wrong, GOP. Please!
reservoir tip to Rob
UPDATE:
Speaking of our beloved Congress, Uncle Jay looks at their grueling schedule:
Now how can we get them to take the rest of the year off? That’s our only hope. (via Gateway)
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on Wednesday, January 7th, 2009 at 9:33 am and is filed under Bedwetting Leftists, Class Warfare, Commies.
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January 8th, 2009 at 7:38 am
I’ve been told this is the way the world works now.
In laying out my anticipated capital expenditures for this year, I plan on spending 500% of last year’s income though I have not received a raise, promotion, additional job, or won the lottery.
My inability to pay for any of those expenditures will now be called a “budget shortfall” and require me to get those funds from you.
Please let me know when you are available to discuss.
Thanks!