Climate Change 98 And The God That Failed
February 13th, 2010 at 10:05 am by BrianI feel better already:
Microsoft co-founder Bill Gates has broken from philanthropic work fighting poverty and disease to take on another threat to the world’s poor — climate change.
“Energy and climate are extremely important to these people,” Gates told Friday a TED Conference audience packed with influential figures including the founders of Google and climate champion Al Gore.
“The climate getting worse means many years that crops won’t grow from too much rain or not enough, leading to starvation and certainly unrest.”
Sometimes it rains too much. Sometimes it doesn’t rain enough. That’s life. Either that or the Goldlilocks’ porridge. I seem to recall a Dust Bowl where it didn’t rain enough. Was that Global Warming caused from aerosol underarm deodorant?
I seem to recall a great flood. Was that because we weren’t cultivating enough windfarms and driving electric cars?
We live on a spinning rock with Parkinson’s disease, people. A rock with a hot molten core. A fever if you will. And the only prescription is more Windows 98.
From the man who ran Microsoft and couldn’t keep his own operating system from crashing, I am less enthused by the thought of him running Nature without prior experience.
“The formula is a very straight forward one,” Gates said. “More carbon dioxide equals temperature increase equals negative effects like collapsed ecosystems. We have to get to zero.”
You first, Breathy.
On the bright side, we can call off the Amber Alert for Al Gore. 49 states are blanketed with snow and he was able to find a spot to peddle his Hot Earth theory where people wouldn’t pelt him snowballs.
UPDATE: I’m a Climate Denying Heretic and we’re all Environmental Sinners In the Hands of An Angry Gaia! Yet at the same time I can get Mac users to defend Gates.
I am truly all things to all people.
February 13th, 2010 at 10:25 am
“I seem to recall a Dust Bowl where it didn’t rain enough. Was that Global Warming caused from aerosol underarm deodorant?”
Uh, no, it was caused by horrible farm practices that stripped soils of their ability to sustain vegetation over time, causing wind erosion to dump nearly half the topsoil of midwest into the atlantic ocean. Humans have an impact. Thanks for backing Gates’ argument with your ignorance.
February 13th, 2010 at 10:40 am
While the farming methods played their role a severe drought facilitated it.
Thanks for playing, cockface.
February 13th, 2010 at 12:00 pm
Brian, To these chuckleheads, the Great San Francisco Quake of 1906 was causes by Gold Rush induced strip mining, Katrina by not ratifying Kyoto and the Haitian Quake by ignoring Copenhagen. I’m sure they heard it from their professors.
February 13th, 2010 at 12:21 pm
I thought the San Fran Quake was caused by a perfect storm of husky children raised on genetically-modified junk food from ConAgra & ADM while being made to jump rope at the same time after being forced to recite the Pledge of Allegiance under a burning cross.
February 13th, 2010 at 12:35 pm
“You first, Breathy.” LOL
February 14th, 2010 at 8:08 am
I’ve got a solution to this anthropogenic global warming problem…
Why doesn’t everyone who believes in it just kill themselves.
That’d be less people vying for scarce food and less carbon dioxide production.
It’s a win-win!!! Not to mention that we wouldn’t have to hear their tripe anymore.
Put your money where your mouth is, zealots!
February 14th, 2010 at 10:12 am
But then who would take our money and redistribute it as needed?
Considering that the British Press is doing the work American so-called “Journalists” are unwilling to do, it stands to reason that the Global Warming War on Prosperity is about something other than the physical environment. It’s about power and control over every aspect of people’s lives. From the food you eat, to the car you drive, to the job you have until your ultimately beneficial-for-the-planet demise.
Now’s let’s run your healthcare too so we can make that happen.