This could have been a disaster.

Luckily, the Secretes Service  finished nailing the hotel’s prostitutes early enough in the evening to swoop in and save her from the next Anna Chapman licking her down for information in the club’s crapper.

Yep.  The adults are in charge.  Don’t.  Stop.  Thinkin’ about your hangover tomorrow.

This misadministration is the equivalent of the L.A. looters circa 30 minutes after the Rodney King verdict.  They’re smashing the windows of our reputation and grabbing as many big screen tvs from the public coffers as they can because Darrell Issa can’t haul all of them in front of Congress at the same time can he?

For all of the talk about what poor, poor Obama inherited from George W. Bush, the one thing that he inherited that he totally didn’t deserve was a military that had been built up in spite of his voting record for eight years.  Perhaps I’m just showing my age here when I remember back to 2004 when John Kerry’s 90 day stint in Vietnam meant he was the only man qualified to the lead the country yet now, this manboy, who assiduously avoided military service and hates veterans is taking credit for the years of intelligence research that went into killing Bin Laden.  It was his gutsy call to sleep on it for 16 hours.

Punching Above His Weight: Little Man Sittin' At The Grown Ups Table

My guts are churning just thinking about it.

Organizing a 40 minute Navy Seal tactical strike  under the cover of darkness in the heart of a Pakistani military retiree town isn’t the same as organizing a bunch of union thugs and welfare queens to march on the local bank for the class crime of having credit standards.

Barack Hussein Obama did not “get” Osama bin Laden – George Bush’s military did in spite of him.

Some of the Seals are starting to complain about being used as campaign props.  That’s to be expected the ungrateful mofos that they are.  Do all the heavy lifting and get the shaft whenever it’s brought up.  Obama’s “generally proud of them” some of the time when they can be used.  Or in that special way that can only be appreciated by a Nobel Peace Prize winner with a precision guided team of elite soldiers whose budgets he constantly longs to cut so that rich Georgetown sluts don’t have to raid their Starbucks fund to abort tomorrow’s adderal addicts.

But does anyone think for a second that Obama contributed anything more to the Assassination of Bin Laden other than not saying “no”?

Unlike a beagle slathered in barbecue sauce, Obama’s fingerprints are not on the Seal team Pakistani raid of bin Laden’s slut compound filled with Just for Men, jackin’ rags and flash drives waiting to be leaked to the media before any actionable intel could be used against his network.

No, his fingerprints are all over Bin Laden’s politically correct and religiously sensitive rushed burial at sea so that the Islamic world (who doesn’t buy into al Qaeda’s message at all because it’s a religion of peace) didn’t have another reason to hate us.  Newspapers can gladly publish pics of US troops posing with dead terrorists but we can’t see the corpse of their leader brought to ballistic justice.

It’s not like we spent, oh, a trillion dollars and thousands of lives to find him after all.

That is Classic Obama.  Ensuring that the man who killed thousands of Americans is given a level of respect that he didn’t deserve to placate the heathens from rioting in the streets of the Middle East.  It took guts to spit in the face of 350 million Americans, give or take 3200 of them, to give Bin Laden a proper funeral instead of dragging him back to the land he attacked to swing from a beam in front of Ground Zero as a message to the scum of the Earth.

Gutsy call, indeed.  In that moment, you showed the world exactly where your sympathies lied.  You couldn’t control his capture but you could certainly kiss his ass in front of the world after he was dead.

No, not really.  Just the usual suspects hyperventilating deep breaths into their man panties in hopes that the Secretes Service can raise their glazed maws from the line of fresh cocaine and inviting chlamydia of underaged  Colombian gape enough to paint Mitt Romney as some headbanging denim demon.

The only reason why the Secretes Getting Serviced would be investigating Nugent would be because they thought there would be some Wang Dang Sweet Poontang around (link not safe for Think Progress).

Back and to the left.  Back and to the left.  Oh yea.  That’s the spot.

A spokesman for the Secret Service tells us, “We are aware of it, and we’ll conduct an appropriate follow up.”

Appropriate meaning “roto-rooter” or appropriate as in “It’s Ted Nugent and we’ll alert Jimmy Carter of a situation?”

It’s doubtful Mittens will be naming Nugent as Surgeon General of Metal Health but it’s good that the Democommies are giving him this chance to remake his image as something other than Wednesday Night Mormon Jubilee choir.

Thanks, dickholes.

Me?  I’m still waiting for the coveted Dave Mustaine endorsement.

Stacey McCain is the only kind of McCain I like but this excited defense of Santorum’s snooping streak doesn’t help anyone:

Yes, this is what Santorum says in a statement, one of about two dozen issue-oriented statements on the “Where I Stand” page of his campaign’s Web site. The statement is clear: Santorum wants to enforce laws that the Obama Administration has refused to enforce.

Would you like me to be more specific — because I could, y’know — about some of the clearly illegal obscenity now available online? Perhaps Jedediah Bila or Judson Phillips should contact former Attorney General Ed Meese or former Justice Department official Mark Levin and ask them about this subject. Because I’m reasonably sure that a whole lot of things now available online are, in fact, illegal.

Do we really need to re-fight what prurient community interest standards again?  These aren’t the old days where that shady shop with the tinted windows and neon lights needed to be harangued into the shitty part of town so all the rich people could drive 20 miles out of their way to buy a skin mag and protect their property values.

You pick your battles. While the decline of Western Civilization can be easily accessed by anyone with a $15 internet connection and a curiosity for just how many thick cuts of manmeat some young, sexually empowered feminist can plug into her adventurous pooter at one time, it takes someone as self-righteous as Santorum to decide he wants to play King Pyhrrus and electively fight his way to the top of that sweaty pile of fun flesh to count them on the public dime.

For the children no doubt.  The little lambs shepherded to safety by the self-anointed Smut Smasher.

Like investigating steroids in baseball, Congress should spend the first six months of the Santorum presidency *shudder* hanging out at strip clubs  watching reel after reel at Xhamster and Youporn to determine how many dicks is too many in a gangbang.  And how many are just right for Goldilock’s gash.

How can I put this politely? Ah! Let’s try this: What you want to do with that baseball bat in the privacy of your own home is strictly up to you, but the video is illegal obscenity.

Did that help clarify the issue somewhat?

…

Remember that Rick Santorum has a law degree and spent 16 years in Congress drafting legislation. He knows the law, and he knows the Constitution, and he knows doggone well that the First Amendment wasn’t intended to protect the kind of filth that’s on the Web nowadays.

So, yes, Santorum promised “vigorous” enforcement to shut down operators who are profiting from commerce in illegal obscenity, and you may agree or disagree with that. But this isn’t an issue that Santorum raised during a stump speech yesterday or that is the subject of his newest campaign ad.

No one’s asked him recently.  Ask him now.  See how far he wants to take it.  I’m guessing to third base on the first interview.

So Santorum would not have an issue with a crowdsourced pornography site where users submitted their own videos and weren’t paid for them.  Because the commerce from perceived illegal obscenity is what gives rise to government investigation?  This veers into Tipper Gore parental advisory sticker territory.  What starts out as wanting to protect little Suzie and Bobby from ever stumbling onto Max Hardcore’s oeuvre (NSFW) quickly devolves into an inquisition of Dee Snider as to why he wants to rock and/or whether or not he will be able to take it (short answer:  No, he ain’t gonna take it.)

Filth is in the eye of the beholder and I think everyone knows that Santorum would see filth as masturbation, premarital sex and non-procreative marital sex to music from anyone other than Pat Boone.  Every time you enter the Missus, you needed to be aiming for baby.

Not to conflate the issues as to whether the Establishment Republicans have the fix in against Santorum – they do.  And Gingrich.  And Paul.   The unholy pentagram of Drudge, Ann Coulter, Mitt Romney, National Review and Barbara Bush have all bathed in the blood of goat sacrifice while listening to Ozzy Osbourne’s “Suicide Solution” to ensure that no one but Romney gets to wear the horns and carry the pitchfork at the Republican convention.

Are the attacks on Santorum coordinated by the Establishment?  Almost certainly.

Are the assertions true that Santorum would use the presidency to enforce his brand of Big Government “I know what’s best for your personal / spiritual life” social conservatism?  Definitely.

From Santorum’s website:

Enforcing Laws Against Illegal Pornography

America is suffering a pandemic of harm from pornography.  A wealth of research is now available demonstrating that pornography causes profound brain changes in both children and adults, resulting in widespread negative consequences. Addiction to pornography is now common for adults and even for some children. The average age of first exposure to hard-core, Internet pornography is now 11. Pornography is toxic to marriages and relationships. It contributes to misogyny and violence against women.  It is a contributing factor to prostitution and sex trafficking.

Every family must now be concerned about the harm from pornography. As a parent, I am concerned about the widespread distribution of illegal obscene pornography and its profound effects on our culture.

Pornography, not illegal pornography mind you, just plain-assed pornography – it’s ruining marriages and causes brain damage.  The science is settled!  This isn’t about “obscenity”.  This is about Rick Santorum deciding that pornography period is not good for anyone and by gum he’s going to nip this in the bud.

I don’t know how many holes a bud has but, gee willikers, Santorum is more than ready to shove the hard cock of big government into as many of them are necessary to fuck the freedom out of the first amendment and get us all holding hands and smooching on the couch in between Family Feud and when we go to bed at a decent hour.

Needless to say, when you’ve lost a white, vinegary Leftist like Bill Maher – your baggeth runneth over (sausage link to Noel Sheppard at the invaluable NewsBusters):

‘Baggin’ It

BILL MAHER: Let me ask you about another occupation, because this is – and you would be good on this too, panel -, the occupation, the Occupy Wall Street, because similar to Afghanistan, when you occupy anything for too long people do get pissed off. And as I watch them on the news now I find myself almost agreeing with Newt Gingrich. Like, you know what – get a job. Only because, you know, the people who originally started, I think they went home and now it’s just these anarchist stragglers. And this is the problem when you, you know, when your movement involves sleeping over in the park. You wind up attracting the people who were sleeping over in the park anyway.

Please adjust your nozzles accordingly.  That comment may come as a shock to any CBS watching diaper defiler, NPR latte enema-ed poser, or MSNBC kool-aid jello-shooter.

With your feeble attempts to play PR Ernie Pyles for Obama’s Army of unwashed Overcredentialed Under-educateds. Or your futile, shirt-wrenching efforts to plant victory gardens in the barren earth of these buy-now, pay-never Anarchists for greater state control.  The only thing that stood in the way of tilling such a fertile narrative was the immovable stone of Subject and the Content.

Were that we able to douche you out to sea with them.

Dole Goes Nuclear

By NRO Staff

January 26, 2012 12:46 P.M.

The Romney campaign sends along a statement by Bob Dole pasted below. Relations between Dole — an establishment figure in the party — and Gingrich were well known to be tense during the 1990s. Here it is:

I have not been critical of Newt Gingrich but it is now time to take a stand before it is too late. If Gingrich is the nominee it will have an adverse impact on Republican candidates running for county, state, and federal offices. Hardly anyone who served with Newt in Congress has endorsed him and that fact speaks for itself. He was a one-man-band who rarely took advice. It was his way or the highway.

Half-dead zombies don’t muster “nuclear” very well.   At best, he can shit his pants and make us all really uncomfortable as he keeps talking and we pretend not to notice.  I’m not a Newt fan by a long stretch but the flood the zone coverage of the establishment right in attacking him just makes me hate Romney more.

Is having the endorsements of the GOP sellouts, paid shills, Brooks Brothers, nancyboys, washed up has-beens and soft-cocked never-were’s the fell blow struck by Team Mittens?

NRO Staff Meeting:  Since we’re out of dick pills, who wants a back rub?

What’s it going to take to get us to buy this used, liberal Masshole.

I’ll tell you what.  I want Mitt Romney to take his starched shirt off.  Take it off. If there’s no magic underwear beneath that suit, I’ll vote for Team Romney.

Because there’s no pill or argument that’s going to make that oddity seem somehow electable.

18 debates and not one question of any depth about Mormonism.  Who’s being setup for the fall?

The Darjeeling Darling

  The money being left on the nightstand is still common practice, correct?

How does Nikki Haley square the circle of betrayal she committed against the people who elected her?

Romney’s decisive defeat Saturday immediately got dropped in part at the feet of the South Carolina governor, who provided him a high-profile endorsement — though a controversial one among the local tea party forces who propelled her into office in 2010. But in this first test both of translating her appeal and playing on the national stage, she flopped.

As Open Secrets noted back in 2010, Romneybot version 08.b was slow playing the buy in anticipation of Romneybot v11.c needing her endorsement in South Carolina a short year away.  It’s very clever the way Romneybot applies his business acumen to purchasing the important properties early and cheap.

ROMNEY LOVE: Former Massachusetts GOP Gov. Mitt Romney has contributed $42,000 to Republican Nikki Haley’s campaign for governor in South Carolina, Politico reported. Currently, Romney has one federal political action committee and five statewide PACs, each contributing $3,500 to Haley’s campaign.

The maximum amount that PACs can contribute to campaigns is $3,500. However, the South Carolina Ethics Committee found that Romney’s five statewide PACs and one federal PAC could each max out their donations to Haley, despite sharing the same leadership and office space.

If the GOP retains the governorship of South Carolina, the new governor will be highly influential with the party’s base. This fact is not lost to potential 2012 GOP presidential candidates like Romney who are backing Haley in her governorship bid in hopes of an endorsement if they run in the GOP presidential primary in 2012.

I cannot fault the CGI of candidates exploiting his highly-beta tested programming and almost lifelike facial gestures to short fuse the electoral process.  It works on paper.

She may have even hurt Romney’s case in the state — there’s a sense that a handful of state legislators who would have backed Romney but refused to out of principle, simply because they hate Haley so much, and mock her for moves like requiring state employees to answer their telephones, “It’s a great day in South Carolina!”

Romney’s state campaign chairman, State Treasurer Curtis Loftis — a political rival of Haley, despite both backing the same presidential candidate — couldn’t resist taking shots at Haley. Less than an hour before the state’s polls closed, Loftis couched his criticisms of Newt Gingrich in terms that sound surprisingly like the way other local operatives describe Haley.

Any “Tea Party” candidate should understand that the establishment hates them.  They don’t like you but they still bought you.  Because you’re charming or something?  Riiiiight.

Haley’s and DeMint’s purchase of Romneybot’s operating license for 2011 shows that they clearly did not read the Tea Party EULA.  Any damages to their electoral hard drives as a result of the software conflict between Romneybot v.11c and the Operating System that got them up running in the first place is purely intentional.

WPBA Hall of Famer Karen Corr:  Not SC Gov. Nikkie Haley

You tell me. Are you better off now than you were 4 years ago?

Obama Headquarters on Rosa Parks Boulevard – October 7, 2008

I think about this every day when I drive by this prime piece of real estate a stone’s throw from the state capitol and across the street from the Farmer’s Market.  Three and a half years later.

Elections have consequences

Lots of consequences

He’s like King Midas.  Except that everything he touches turns to shit.

Who does this strip mall think it is doing impersonations of a White House event for CEOs?

Substitute New Jersey, the AFL-CIO and the EPA for Italy and Greece and you have a National Review article.

In the high profile wake of Iraq’s new corruptocracy kicking us out of the country we liberated from Saddam Hussein and Hamid Karzai’s candid admission that he would rather side with Pakistan against us is there any other reasonable conclusion to arrive at other than our troops should not wait until the end of the year to evacuate?  The hardline Iranian tied backers that constitute the new Iraqi Caliphate are grudgefucking their goats at the opportunity to put US soldiers on trial.  In Karzai’s case, the man would have been killed long ago had we not been the shield to protect him from the eternal poppy field in the sky.

And this is the thanks we get?

Not one soldier should expect to waste another drop of sweat to pay for Obama’s re-election campaign and his spin for this unmitigated cludterf*ck will be magnificent.  He killed Osama Bin Laden with the special forces and intelligence apparatus he inherited from his predecessor and assassinated Qaddafi in Days, Not Weeks(tm) (in many months actually) for the crime of him not being the ruler of Syria.

Excuse me.  Obama killed Qaddafi once Qaddafi was killed.  It was a NATO operation when he was still at large.

He brought our troops home from Iraq (after getting us kicked out) and Afghanistan is siding with the people he’s been bombing with drone strikes.  It is truly amazing what can be accomplished when the media doesn’t hound the President for following the letter of international law.

Pouring water on the head of a non-uniformed terrorist captured on a battlefield?  High crimes ready for impeachment!  An extra-judicial killing of a US citizen who was a propagandist for our enemies?  Courage.  Leadership.  Hemming and hawing about means to an end if that.  John Walker Lindh was lucky he wasn’t caught in Obama’s time.  Since he was caught under Bush he’s a hero to the Left.  If it were a few years later his bloody mug would be pasted at the top of the NY Times with a “Got Him!” 72-font headline.

This could have all gone very differently.  Instead, China and Russia got the Iraqi oil contracts (thanks to John Kerry) and the Taliban was overthrown so that we could build the country up and hand it back to them better than new. This is what, somehow, qualifies Hillary Clinton as some kind of foreign policy expert.  At the State Department, she’s moved from Carrot Top “Reset Button” prop diplomacy and now we’re on to charades.

It’s enough to make you want to vote for Ron Paul.

TRENTON— A top Republican said Wednesday that Gov. Chris Christie really is not running for president, even as political commentators began to use sexual imagery to discuss Christie flirting with the possibility.

That’s going to be a hard image to shake.

Lawrence E. Bathgate II of Lakewood, who has led fundraising for three presidents and a presidential nominee, said that after a series of high-level telephone calls, he is convinced that Christie is not headed into the GOP primaries for president.

“I heard him say that he wasn’t running last night. Everything I know, and everyone I’ve talked to — and it doesn’t get much closer than the people on the plane with him — say he’s not running,” Bathgate said in an interview.

Yes, it’s cheap taking shots at Christie.  To be fair, I’ll take cheap shots at Sarah Palin shortly.  But when he starts holding court about foreign policy – don’t start talking about exceptionalism and why we don’t have any but that you’re not going to do anything about it.  Are people on the right so hard up for a candidate that they’ve turned chubby chaser?

Same with Sarah Palin.  Go sell your books.  Go raise your kids.  Three and a half years of “I’m running / I’m not sure I’m running” blue balls are enough for me thank you very little.  Quit dry humping conservatives for attention.  My leg can’t take it anymore.