Only if he drops out of the work force permanently:

It is so sad and so hard to write it again, but it’s true: Peyton Manning is done in Indianapolis.

After listening to Manning Monday night, after listening to owner Jim Irsay characterize Manning Thursday as “a politician” who should keep his concerns “in house,” there’s no other conclusion to be reached by a sane, sober human being: Manning’s days in Indianapolis are over, and they have been over for quite some time. On a day when the introduction of Chuck Pagano as the Colts new head coach should have been the story, Irsay stole the headlines.

The NFL is a cut-throat industry where the all-American, clean living, do-everything-right poster boy for your organization and the League is tossed out in the street so a mediocre team like the Colts can hope to get Luck-y by throwing the dick of their future on the craps table of the next Draft?  Say it ain’t so!

My heart aches for the state of Indiana.  For about two seconds.  Any way.

If anyone in earshot can communicate this to Manning:  Come home to Tennessee.

Quit designing video games and do it for real.  The University of Tennessee is in such a state of disrepair that they’re having to layoff police officers because the team isn’t even worth arresting anymore.  That burglary is going unsolved.

Take this game to another level.  Use UT to be a flagship student-athlete program where you recruit the talent and bring them up through the ranks to create a next NFL generation with a little more humility and a little less pitbull fighting.

Be the anti-Spurrier.

And left about November 4th.

You tell me. Are you better off now than you were 4 years ago?

Obama Headquarters on Rosa Parks Boulevard – October 7, 2008

I think about this every day when I drive by this prime piece of real estate a stone’s throw from the state capitol and across the street from the Farmer’s Market.  Three and a half years later.

Elections have consequences

Lots of consequences

He’s like King Midas.  Except that everything he touches turns to shit.

Who does this strip mall think it is doing impersonations of a White House event for CEOs?

Congresswoman Marsha Blackburn warns the bikers over their carbon emissions.

Live simulcast starts at 1PM CST through the official We Stand With Gibson site.

What is it about American Exceptionalism that the soon-to-be ex-President Urkel H. Anti-Christ, Jr. hates so much?  Much like the impetus for the astroturfed “Occupy Wall Street” mob scenes, it has a lot to do with whether your check cleared the DNC.  Like the radio payola scandals, it also appears that federal agents are taking requests with mercenary aplomb from the far Left end of your dial.

The abbreviated version is that earlier this year Obama’s eco-stormtroopers at the hilariously misnamed US Dept. of Fish and Wildlife attacked the guitar manufacturer during a daring daylight raid, guns draw on employees, out of fear that Gibson’s inventory of awesome would have been flushed down their toilets had they simply knocked on the door with a search warrant.

Makes you proud to be an American, doesn’t it?  I mean it’s not selling automatic weapons to Mexican Drug Cartels in order to pin gang violence on US gun owners but it’s a nice touch.

At issue seems to be that Gibson employs documented American citizens to do some fit and finish work on the wood used in their instruments.  Americans who should be drawing patriotic unemployment checks. 

In an interview with Beck radio affiliate KMJ 105.9 in Fresno, California, Juszkiewicz told host Chris Daniel that the government made the point “explicitly:”

CHRIS DANIEL:  Mr. Juszkiewicz, did an agent of the US government suggest to you that your problems would go away if you used Madagascar labor instead of American labor?

HENRY JUSZKIEWICZ:  They actually wrote that in a pleading.

CHRIS DANIEL:  Excuse me?

HENRY JUSKIEWICZ:   They actually wrote that in a pleading.

CHRIS DANIEL:  That your problems would go away if you used Madagascar labor instead of our labor?

HENRY JUSKIEWICZ:  Yes, yeah. They said that explicitly.

It’s not that the wood is harvested from the Tree of Souls from Avatar though if it were it would probably rock your face off and simultaneously get your cats pregnant.  And it’s not that a foreign government lodged a complaint.  No, US Fish and Wildlife decided to pro-actively enforce another country’s laws and pervert one of our own when the other country did not think it was a problem.  Gee, I wonder why.

One of Gibson’s leading competitors is C.F. Martin & Company. The C.E.O., Chris Martin IV, is a long-time Democratic supporter, with $35,400 in contributions to Democratic candidates and the DNC over the past couple of election cycles. According to C.F. Martin’s catalog, several of their guitars contain “East Indian Rosewood.” In case you were wondering, that is the exact same wood in at least ten of Gibson’s guitars.

The Gibson facility wasn’t raided over allegations of tax evasion, charges of embezzlement, or even something as drab as child labor. Not even close. It was raided over what the DOJ deems an inability to follow a vague domestic trade law in India (one that apparently the Indian government didn’t seem too concerned about enforcing) regarding a specific type of wood. Not illegal wood, just wood with obscenely specific procedural guidelines.

While armed federal agents assert prosecutorial discretion to enforce another country’s protectionist laws.  We all know what this is.  The same thing that happened to car dealerships that contributed to Republicans after the bailout.  The same thing that happened to Ford when the White House demanded that they retract their anti-bailout commercials.

The Chicago Way may be fine for blues music and deep dish pizza but it’s  un-American in a Presidency.

Everybody lend your support to this international icon today being forced to decide whether they should  layoff all of it’s US employees to stay in the good graces of our Gangster Government or fight the good fight until this administration is thrown out on its red diaper rash in 13 months.
*********
B-Mac Update: (more…)

We’re a little over a year removed from the Great Nashville Flood of 2010.  Through it all, I remember the countless visions of neighbors helping neighbors.    That didn’t include Police Chief Ronal Serpas who abandoned the city a week after the rains hit for greener, golder and purpler pastures.

No, that was the first sign that the city was recovering.  As I watched the turd of his ascendancy, buoyed by the rising waters of the Cumberland River, as it floated towards the bowl of New Orleans – I couldn’t help but feel sorry for them

May 15th, 2010 “And This Little Piggy Went Wee, Wee, Wee All The Way Home”

What has happened (to New Orleans)recently???  I’m at a loss unless…wait…there was something that happened just this last week:

Nashville Police Chief Ronal Serpas takes job in New Orleans

Did the bouquet resemble fried bologna, Old Spice, jowl sweat and feet?  Because if it did, I think we’ve found our culprit.

For a city that prides itself on bacchanalian revelry, the stale sock of Chief Teetotaler is about to drape across the nose of your good time for the foreseeable future.

I’d say to prepare for the jump in violent crime and unsolved murders too (our’s is close to 40% now), but thanks to the Legacy of Naginomics you all should be ready to make that drunken, hobo stumble into Chicago gangland numbers.

Congratulations to your up and coming funeral home industry and may it replace all the French Quarter businesses forced to close once he starts enacting the same DUI laws that he did here.

Damn, it sucks to be so right.

New Orleans murder studies show rate is 10 times national average

Published: Saturday, March 26, 2011, 1:45 PM

Murder.

How prevalent is it? How do police stop it? What can be done?

The two analyses, the result of months-long studies conducted late last year by the federal government, attempt to shed light on the myriad factors that conspire to make New Orleans the nation’s most murderous city.

With reams of data and statistics, federal experts determined that New Orleans’ homicide rate is 10 times higher than the national rate and five times higher than the rate for comparably sized cities.

This is just for starters.  Serpas has only been there a year.  His solution is going to be to break out a computer and start feeding it garbage statistics to make you forget all those bodies you’ll be seeing on the news every night by putting a COMSTAT graphic on the Internet to make you think he’s doing something.  And prepare  for a full-scale assault by NOPD to bring the full, pedantic force of traffic law enforcement down on the heads of the citizenry scofflaws  to solve the murder problem.

It makes sense as Serpas was recently and curiously cleared of any wrongdoing in a scandal where the contract for reviewing traffic tickets was awarded to his best friend and a myriad of other double-dipping, doling out sweetcake off-duty police work assignment scandals that might sink the average bullshitter.

Indeed, NOLA.  It sucks to be you.  Flush Serpas now before he starts lulling you into a false sense of security by repeatedly defining rapes and sexual assaults  down to “Matters Of Record” like he did to juke the stats here.

Tennessee took a step towards cleaner elections this week with the passage of a Voter ID bill that burdens those citizens exercising their franchise with the same requirements as those to buy cigarettes and alcohol.  In other words, a “backdoor poll tax” as demagogued by local white trash House Democratic Caucus Chairman Mike Turner.

Poll Taxes, it seems, are breaking out all over in the mid-state.  Take the plight of this at-risk youth:

NASHVILLE, Tenn. – A former TSU student on trial for murder in Arkansas said he killed a man in East Nashville in 2006.

Abdulhakim Muhammad is accused of killing one Army soldier and wounding another outside a military recruiting station in 2009. He’s now confessed to shooting a Nashville man as part of a “Jihad Operation.”

The father of Carlos Bledsoe believes his son became an extremist Muslim during his time in Nashville.

…

Muhammad did travel to Yemen after attending Tennessee State University. He said he is a member of Al-Qaeda, but detectives haven’t found any proof of that claim.

In other words, Defendant Muhammad’s undocumented membership in Al Qaeda has denied him Allah’s glory by our racist police department.  The failure of both Al Qaeda and the state of Tennessee to preserve Mr. Muhammad’s civil rights and to allow him to express himself fully because of his minority status calls back to the days of Jim Crow, Bull Connor, firehoses and german shepherds.  Selma ™ even.

Of course, Mr. Muhammad was in no way radicalized by Nashville’s peace palace the Al-Farooq Islamic Center whose annual Hate Crime Hoax performance art has entertained and educated the city through their self-deprecating DIY vandalism. The Al-Farooq Peace Palace has also posted a strongly worded rebuke to Mr. Muhammad’s black father of “malicious, xenophobic allegations”.

Al-Farooq Islamic Center would like to take this opportunity to refute strongly the malicious, xenophobic allegation purpoted against our center during the congressional hearing addressing homegrown islamic terrorism. As many of you might have heard, a certain mr. Melvin Bledsoe, have accused our center of teaching radicalism to our kids. These allegations are not only baseless, but they are also absurd and contrary to what Al-Farooq Islamic Center stands for.

Well that settles that.  When a 19 year old converts to Islam and wins an all expenses paid trip to a terrorist training camp in Yemen and returns to murder a US soldier at a recruiting facility then  it was obviously underwritten by his summer lawn mowing business and at the urging of those no-goodniks at the Elks Lodge.

I hope the Nashville City Paper, the Nashville Scene and The Nashville Post (ed: I repeat myself) will run cover story after cover story to bring attention to the plight of our state’s under-documented Islamic jihadi enthusiasts.

If they don’t get free government issued IDs so that we can identify the real ones from the pretenders then those really dangerous Nazi, KKK Republicans have already won or something.

Ron Ramsey is officially too stupid to remain Lt. Governor of Tennessee. Quite a feat in and of itself.

How else to explain naming a Liberadio-ing, democrat voting, Daily Kossifying, Dave Weigel worshipping, never-miss-an-opportunity-to-cheap-shot-a-conservative House Donkey like Adolph Klanheider to be his Communications Director?

To paraphrase The Godfather:

Don Corleone: [kisses Michael] Listen, whoever comes to you with this Klainheider recommendation, he’s the traitor. Don’t forget that.

You’re going to live to regret putting the enemy in charge of your message, Boots.

If it makes you feel any better, 99% of those corn cobs vote Democrat.

Don’t worry, Li’l Davey.  The state’s going to provide this Kernell all the butter and salt he needs.

A federal judge has shot down a former University of Tennessee student’s bid to have tossed out convictions in the illegal access of Sarah Palin’s personal e-mail account during the 2008 presidential election.

[...]

Davies argued it was nothing more than a college prick prank by a rank assbag computer amateur. Federal prosecutors assigned a more sinister motive, arguing Kernell, the son of long-time Memphis Democratic state Rep. Mike Kernell, went searching for politically damaging information but came up empty-handed.

The feds slapped Kernell with four felony charges. At his trial in April jurors rejected a wire fraud charge outright, reduced a felony illegal e-mail access charge to a misdemeanor, deadlocked on an identity theft count and convicted Kernell of the felony charge of anticipatory obstruction of justice.

It’s always the “cover-up” that gets you.  It has dibs. But after the cover-up gets you then Jamal does.

Riddle me this:  If Li’l Davy gets his ass kernel popped in Cell block 6 will it make a sound?  I’m guessing yes.  First a wimper, followed by some open weeping before Big Bear’s squeaky bed springs gently rock him to sleep.  Maybe that will be more “his type”.

Night, night ya jag.  It’s a real shame that a few of your unscrupulous supporters can’t go with you in a show of solidarity.

Not ones to let an opportunity to publicity whore go unmolested, however tangential.  Those meth-worn lot lizards of PETA have hiked up their skirts and are flashing their road beef tofu at passersby at the site where the Non-Existent Hate Crime didn’t take place at the Islamic Center in Murfreesboro to Raise Awareness ™.  Of what?  I have no idea.

I’m sure it’s only unintentional that their organization, which is about as anti-human as they come, would consider Muslims to be animals in need of protection.  Yet, there they are:

PETA President Ingrid E. Newkirk asked Sheikh Ossama Bahloul on Thursday if the organization could place a sign at the construction site promoting compassion and understanding for all individuals.”The artwork features images of peas arranged to represent different religious symbols, including the Christian cross, the Muslim star and crescent, the Hindu Aum, and the Jewish Star of David, and reads, ‘Give Peas a Chance”

Oh, that’s right.  They went there.  Visual Whirled Peas.  

“Human beings of all nationalities and religions often feel powerless in the face of all the discrimination and violence in the world, yet every time that we sit down to eat, we can help stop suffering by choosing a nonviolent meal,” the PETA president adds. “While opting for a veggie burger or falafel over a chicken kebab or steak sandwich won’t create instant global peace, it will reduce the sum total of suffering and make one think about what more is possible.”

Non-violence starts on your plate.  If only those 19 hijackers had been eating a soy burger they wouldn’t have crashed those carbon-chugging jet planes into the Twin Mosque Centers in New York and the Mosque Prayer Room at the Pentagon before crashing Flight 93 into the mosque field in Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

Of course, PETA was always willing to look the other way when it came to their friends in Big Pea.  Jim “The Jolly Green Giant” Scofield had long been dogged by scandal after it was revealed that he harvested his crop with the help of illegal child labor.

Guillermo “Sprout” Lopez’s tell-all book “Little Hands:  An Immigrant’s Tale” aimed for the hearts but hit the stomachs after an OSHA investigation revealed working conditions that culminated in the 1993 E. Coli outbreak that the pea industry has never fully recovered from and a DHS report of “sexual battery by an authority figure” that netted Mr. Scofield a 13 year sentence at a federal maximum security prison in Adelanto, California.  He’s slated for parole just in time for the tenth anniversary of 9/11.  How convenient.

But Ms. Newkirk would probably prefer to forget that sad chapter in her zealous attempts to lobby for Big Pea.

As Lopez’s courtroom testimony confirmed, “He would get Peas whenever he quit fighting”.

It’s like the climax getaway scene in Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry where Vic Morrow (though not half-black or wearing a safety helmet)  is chasing after Peter Fonda and Susan George (two white, non-Muslims I might add) and he can’t quite nab them but he gets so inside of their heads that they screw themselves up.

That’s O’bama’s Luck of the Irish.   The Man In Command.  And this is going to make you feel so much better about airport security.

Two men taken off a Chicago-to-Amsterdam United Airlines flight in the Netherlands have been charged by Dutch police with “preparation of a terrorist attack,” U.S. law enforcement officials tell ABC News.

U.S. officials said the two appeared to be travelling with what were termed “mock bombs” in their luggage. “This was almost certainly a dry run, a test,” said one senior law enforcement official.

Not to worry, not to worry.  Both men only made it through two U.S. airports in Chicago and Birmingham, allowed to board both planes with mock bombs, multiple cellphones, large knives, box cutters and thousands in cash and they were still allowed to fly to Amsterdam.  I feel better already about this TSA agent fisting my prostate and having to wear pajamas and slippers to the airport while getting strip searched alongside some nuns from Dubuque and a kid with asthma in a wheelchair.

Meanwhile, Jethro the Security Guard is allowed to use the body scanner to take naked pictures of you and your kids and send them to his home e-mail account to jerk to and share with his friends later.

Though ABC News fails to identify the particular religious affiliation of these as yet Innocent Until Proven Guilty* ™ suspects,  Ahmed Mohamed Nasser al Soofi and Hezem al Murisi, they did mention that one is from Yemen which is widely known for its militant, rightwing teabagger Christianist population.

Because you see, we can jump to conclusions about some people and not others.

As we’ve seen with the Kentucky Census Worker case, you can blame limited government conservatives and accuse them of murder, try and convict them with zero evidence.  And never issue a correction.

You can be a leftwing Talking Points Memo blogger and firebomb and Democrat’s campaign office and they’ll blame Tea Partiers.

Or, you can be a lifelong Democrat who calls yourself a Tea Partier and makes a bunch of racist comments to smear them buy association.  It’s not like Professional Journalists with layers of fact-checkers are ever going to investigate who you are before they smear conservatives with their false narratives.

So when a fire mysteriously starts at a jihad training camp and the national media immediately jumps to the conclusion that some Constitution-loving, Patriotard has been stoking his anger after a long night of banging his head to Lee Greenwood and tracing his trigger finger around his leatherbound Glenn Beck transcripts that you’re going to have to excuse me for being a bit skeptical that a movement so paranoid about people making it look like a bunch of hillbilly racists would so easily play into the enemy’s hands when their enemies have such a history of planting the evidence on them.

Just because you’re comfortable with you bicyc-uality doesn’t mean I am.

Who’s up for another vacation?!?

Sooo…what else did you want to do today?

For all the talk about weening our dependence on foreign oil, it’s about time we had someone choked off our dependence off from foreign drugs.  Take that, al Qaeda:

A man busted for growing marijuana in Trousdale County said he was helping the country fight terrorism.

…

the man told him he had seen former President George W. Bush once say that people who buy drugs off the street were supporting terrorism, so he decided to grow his own.

So long, Afghan Kush.  Unleash America’s agricultural might and subdue our enemies at the same time with strategic strikes of blu-ray players, boxed sets of That 70′s Show and then when their knees are wobbly and their basement couches are broken in,  carpetbomb them with Reese’s Peanut Butter cups.

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!  We might not be able to put a man on the moon (now anyways), plug an oil leak or balance a check book but dammit if we can’t grow a weed, with 10% unemployment and when nobody can make a dollar or a cent, then we might as well throw the towel in.

New Orleans has a problem with stank.   Not to confuse our seven readers, but a new stank – not the old one.

I’m going to question the timing:

NEW ORLEANS — At almost 300 years old, somewhat moldy from the remnants of Hurricane Katrina and surrounded by muddy water and swamps, this city is not exactly known for being lemony fresh.

…

But from the French Quarter to New Orleans East, people here have been complaining about a tinge to the air that is unsettling even by local standards.

What has happened recently???  I’m at a loss unless…wait…there was something that happened just this last week:

Nashville Police Chief Ronal Serpas takes job in New Orleans

Did the bouquet resemble fried bologna, Old Spice, jowl sweat and feet?  Because if it did, I think we’ve found our culprit.

For a city that prides itself on bacchanalian revelry, the stale sock of Chief Teetotaler is about to drape across the nose of your good time for the foreseeable future.

I’d say to prepare for the jump in violent crime and unsolved murders too (our’s is close to 40% now), but thanks to the Legacy of Naginomics you all should be ready to make that drunken, hobo stumble into Chicago gangland numbers.

Congratulations to your up and coming funeral home industry and may it replace all the French Quarter businesses forced to close once he starts enacting the same DUI laws that he did here.

Frank Rich, who usually writes for the NY Times earlier in the week in blackface under the name “Charles Blow”, is up to his rote antics this week in condemning the mote in Fox News’s eye (and everybody else really) for not paying enough attention to the real Big Story this week while ignoring the beam in his own:

They Don’t Report. You Don’t Have to Decide.

By FRANK RICH

Published: May 8, 2010

“DESPITE the major environmental disaster unfolding in the Gulf and the attempted terror attack on New York’s Times Square, President Obama spent his Saturday night laughing it up at the White House Correspondents Dinner,” griped Sean Hannity of Fox News last week. His complaint is not inaccurate. But it’s hardly the whole story.

…

Here’s the time line from last Saturday. At 6:30 p.m. the abandoned Nissan Pathfinder was found smoking in Times Square. Relevant public officials marooned at the correspondents dinner in Washington quickly got word. Over the next hour and a half, several news organizations spread it as well while Times Square was evacuated. To clear the Broadway theater district at curtain time on Saturday night isn’t like emptying a high school; it’s a virtual military operation. By 8 p.m., the crossroads of the world looked like a ghost town, yet if you tuned in to a cable news network, it wasn’t news. No one seemed to know or to care. On MSNBC, which I was watching, it didn’t even merit a mention on a crawl.

The real news story was that Rich was lotioning himself up to Rachel Maddow and Ed Schultz re-runs on MSNBC that Saturday night.  Shocker, really.  Imagine how people in Nashville felt on May 3rd when they were flooded on May 1st without a week’s worth of warning like Katrina victims had.

Apparently little short of King Kong climbing up 30 Rock could have grabbed the network’s attention. When MSNBC did take a brief break from the dinner for news updates at 9:30, Times Square didn’t make the cut. Whether this was due to ignorance, ineptitude or an unwillingness to play party pooper is a distinction without a difference. Real-time coverage of Leno bombing (since when is that news?) mattered more than any actual bombs. Only as the dinner wound down, at 10:54, did MSNBC at last muster a “breaking news” bulletin about the Times Square story that had in fact been breaking for hours.

The gist of Frank’s typical navel-gazing seems to be that during the White House Correspondent’s Dinner last weekend that the attempted Times Square bombing had not garnered flood-the-zone coverage between the time Faisal Shahzad’s burning Pathfinder was found at 6:30pm and the clearing out of Times Square by 8:00pm.

Does the national news need to be alerted every time a car catches on fire in New York?

Can anyone honestly claim that the attempted Times Square bombing hasn’t gotten wall-to-wall, 24/7 coverage this last week?

Shahzad’s name doesn’t even appear in Rich’s column at all.  Nor does “Islam” or “jihad” as long as we’re judging sins of omission.

What constitutes Rich’s “closing argument” in his indictment against Fox News, et. al shows he is as guilty as he is clueless:

As we venerate the heroic street vendors who gave America its reality check last weekend, we should remember that they were the first to report what was happening in Times Square and that those covering and attending the White House Correspondents Dinner were the last.

While mentioning the Iceland volcano, Hurricane Katrina, the gulf oil spill and lamenting (of all people) the lack of civility in American politics, Rich failed to note there was some other story going on last week as well out there in Teabagger Country.  Something about the largest non-hurricane disaster in US history didn’t warrant even a passing acknowledgment in a full page op/ed about ignoring major news stories because they didn’t happen at a Manhattan intersection.

But screw those people, right Frankie?  The NY Times has consistently pressed the snooze button through every wake-up call the American people have given them on getting their news reporting right.

Better late than never.  Which is what we got.

Where my commies at?

Obama plays golf while wife speaks in Arkansas

(AP) – 9 hours ago

WASHINGTON — President Barack Obama is playing golf while his wife, Michelle, delivers a college commencement speech in Pine Bluff, Ark.

The president watched his daughter Malia play soccer Saturday before heading to the Fort Belvoir course to play golf.

Politicizing the gulf oil spill, having Iran spit in our face,plotting the destruction of Israel, bragging about how high unemployment is actually a sign of economic recovery, and oh yes, ignoring the largest non-hurricane disaster in US history – oh yes he can and no, he can’t be bothered.

Hrm, I certainly remember how this played out a few years ago.

Two AP photos from this past Tuesday, placed side by side, tell a story.

Here a fellow named George W. Bush is having a delightful time playing a guitar given to him by country singer Mark Wills after a visit to Naval Base Coronado in sunny southern California. It’s fun to be president.

Here firefighters and rescue workers try to cope with the worst disaster to strike Americans since 9/11. It is not a good day for them.

David Corn, September 2005

Where little Davey Corn on this?  Where all my commies?

Yea, you can imagine.  Playing politics and the race card as usual.

Day 7 – Obama Imitates Me Imitating Obama Being a Lazy Ass, Disrespectful Mofo Completely Unsuited For His Title.

Of course, when I posted the Day 5 Update making fun of Teh Won’s proclivity to find a way to play golf when he should be doing anything else there was always a kernel of truth in the jibe.

Suffice it to say, I was merely showcasing my legendary clairvoyance:

Obama plays golf while wife speaks in Arkansas

By The Associated Press

Saturday, May 8, 2010 at 12:50 p.m.

WASHINGTON — President Barack Obama is playing golf while his wife, Michelle, delivers a college commencement speech in Pine Bluff, Ark.

The president watched his daughter Malia play soccer Saturday before heading to the Fort Belvoir course to play golf.

If I were a Democrat in Nashville I would be a bit put off by the snub.  But that’s just me.  I have pride and self-respect.  Your mileage may vary.

Day 5 -  Waffler-In-Chief Update: When asked to respond on the status of federal efforts to the billions in damage due to the Tennessee floods, Joe Cool (aka “Mr. Wonderful Hussein Obama”) took a break from a round of golf to do his job, “Listen you filthy crackers, I just lost a Titleist to the water hazard on a Par 4 AND I haven’t even had my waffle today so don’t imply that I don’t know about hardship.   We’ve been there since Day 1.*”

Newbusters notes the anemic attention.

It is being reported that Nashville flood victims have begun eating each other and raping babies on the feces-strewn floor of Bridgestone Arena. My hands tremble as I write this.

Dramatic Re-enactment as verified by Randall Robinson.

After initial reports of explosions that rocked the J. Percy Priest dam had been confirmed, investigators were fired upon by black helicopters as they attempted to survey the extent of the damage. Was it an underwater scuba explosives team? Who can say? All who attempted to find the truth were murdered in cold blood and have been stacked up and used for kindling in the parking lot of the Stewart’s Ferry Pike Cracker Barrel.

The West End P.F. Chang’s rivals Pol Pot’s Killing Fields as the littered bones of the damned tinkle and clink throughout the dining room floor in a near genocidal concerto.

Though widespread looting has become the norm, even the most crestfallen native wept in horror as the police department commandeered vehicles at Crest-Hummer-Cadillac on Rosa Parks Blvd., abandoned the citizenry and waited the storm out at the Harrah’s Metropolis while gambling with money stolen from the pockets of the dead.

When reached for comment three days after the flood, FEMA underling  W. Craig Fugate fumed, “Hold your brewed water you fucking teabagging faggots.  We’ll get there when we get there.  Don’t think we weren’t keeping score, brother.”

Despite the large African-American population in Nashville, their skin color has been of little help in ameliorating the media blackout that has been transfixed on an alleged bomber, one Pakistani Tea Partier who failed to cause even a single papercut  in New York because authorities were clearly in control of the situation at all times thanks to good ole fashioned police work.

Thousands are still waiting on their roofs at this very moment for a glimpse of Sean Penn to rescue them from the swelling rivers they inherited from the Bush administration.

The Shoney’s in Bellevue may still be underwater but you can get all your Nashville Flood news updates from Six Meat Buffet as it is invented.

DAY 4!!! – w00t! We’re up to 373 Google News hits on “Obama Tennessee Flood”

Heckuva Job, Barry.

Because you see, when you’re elected President that means that you have to be President of all of it. Like it or not. Not just a couple of metro coastal cities and a few Rust Belt union thug holdouts.

I’mma let ya finish, but – for serious, Barack Obama don’t care about Southern people. Give or take Atlanta or Chocolate City.

A guy can dream, can’t he? It was either that or Kernell Cornhole Goes To The Clink.

This case has been entertaining for so many reasons.  The celebrity, the hypocritical Leftists, the Internet, the hypocritical Leftists, the politics and, most importantly, the hypocritical Leftists.

When is breaking into someone’s e-mail, changing passwords, posting private messages all over the place, bragging about it, then half-assedly covering your tracks followed by insulting the victim’s daughter at trial acceptable?  Why, when you’re a Democommie and the object of your diseased attentions is a hot conservative governor whose ass could easily produce three pints of french vanilla ice cream an hour.

The felon doesn’t fall far from the bastard.  He and his father had a good laugh I’m sure.  They retreated to the bunker because they knew what he did was a felony.   Aiding and abetting a felon should at least get you kicked off out of the legislature.  He learned it from somebody.

Now Goldilocks is going to get to know some of his father’s constituents up close and personal with a get-out-the-vote drive in his cell until his ass porridge is – too tight (!), too loose and finally just right.

There is no defense for Kernell.   Now the people who have no problem convicting people who never did anything wrong like, say Sarah Palin, will defend someone who has been found dead guilty in a court of law.

Not to worry, Davey.  They can take away your iPod, your internet connection, your voting rights and your manhood but as a Democrat you didn’t need half of those anyway.

After comparing Tea Partiers to klansmen without the robes and hoods, the singing sissy South Detroit Memphis’ congresscumbag Sammy Davis Cohen, Jr. said that he understood the Kristallnacht he was witnessing at protests of the government takeover of all private health care because he had seen it before when angry Tennesseans surrounded the capitol with their cars and honked their horns to protest an unconstitutional income tax.  It’s practically the same thing as genocide.

And that the only reason why people were against socialized health care, punitive energy taxes and amnesty for illegal aliens is because Obama’s black.  Welcome to your post-racial America, everybody.

In related news, congratulations to Former Governor Don Sundquist who is now officially considered black because Tennesseans successfully fought off his state income tax proposal.  Way to go, homie.   You made it into the club.

I still wouldn’t advise you to drive in Memphis after dark though.

Cohen, on the other hand, needs to schedule a few more visits to the tanning bed before he reapplies to join the Congressional Black Caucus again.

Weasel Zippers is busting Chuckles McBagofSnacks for telling pony tales out of school:

Charles Johnson “Fairly Sure” the Tennesee State Flag is a Neo-Nazi Logo…

Mandy Messypants:  I saw it at a Vlaams Belaang rally.  Straight up Nazi.

Cunto The Incontinent: Amanda Geller flies it over her FEMA concentration camp.

Pillwhore Troutmouth:    Obviously, Irish nazi Celtic Wolves!

I’ve been trying to find some hidden meaning behind the California state flag but there’s just nothing to work with.

In Jim Jones, Jerry Brown, Red Dellums, Natasha Pelosivic and Senator* Barbara Boxer We Trust

/because of the triskeles!

Like the Masonic all-seeing Eye of Providence, our subliminal neo-nazism has embedded itself deeper than you can ever imagine:

Dumb ass.

Today Tennessee, Tomorrow the World!

The Science Is Settled! UPDATE: Little Green Frogboilers is 30% more vinegary than the leading douche.   You noticing that I’m getting my little, pink panties in a twist and going on a Nazi Witch-hunt  over a state flag while all my commenters smear away is really a sign of what a wingnut YOU are!    What a lying PoS.

In a strained defense of wasteful “make work” projects to temporarily sustain government employees and their favorite no-bid contractors, the Bolshevik revolution continues with aplomb as the SouthCommunists at the reconstituted Nashville City Paper (NCP) serve up a little cover story complete with quasi-Soviet/NorK iconography:

You Forgot To Add The Sickle

ed. note – Six Meat Buffet uses Commie iconography as parody – not praise.

Among some of the brilliant observations from the Kremlinesque note-takers at the NCCCP:

More than $1 billion in stimulus funds have flowed into Tennessee’s 5th Congressional District, represented by U.S. Rep. Jim Cooper, a Democrat who voted for the recovery act. That money has created nearly 7,000 jobs in the geographic area that includes Davidson and parts of Wilson and Cheatham counties, according to federal figures that cover Oct. 1 to Dec. 31, 2009.

At $1,000,000,000.00, that’s roughly $143,000 per job.  Excuse me, “nearly” 7,000 jobs.  Round it up a little.  Now would those be full-time jobs in the private sector that will be contributing taxes next year or a gubmint project filling potholes for 3 months because that’s a top 1-percenter income being funneled through the models of efficiency that are the federal and state government.  At least on Charity Navigator we can see how much went to Administrative costs.

The government’s stimulus-tracking website, recovery.gov, is designed to offer transparency about how the federal funds are being spent, and indeed, the wealth of information is almost overwhelming. The slightest bit of navigation will reveal initiatives throughout Nashville. Some, mostly construction projects, were unveiled with staged photo-ops and now don the familiar red-blue-and-green stimulus logo at their sites. Others have gone largely unnoticed. The list is much too lengthy to cover in its entirety without risking utter boredom.

You read that right.  Indeed,  they would hate to bore all you 10+% unemployed Tennesseans out there with all this free funemployment time on your hands. The information is so overwhelming we simply don’t have the ink to describe how completely awesome it is.

I thought this level of lickspittle A2M Soviet cockslobbery was reserved strictly for The Nashville Scene.

Indeed, I certainly don’t want to bore you with any more of the slavish teabaggery that Joey Garrison begged for at the wrinkled sack of the Obama Administration but this was just too much:

More heat on the street: Perhaps the most celebrated stimulus project allocated to Metro — hailed by Dean and others — is the $9 million grant awarded to the police department to bring on 50 new officers. According to spokesman Don Aaron, most of the money pays for salaries and other benefits.

That’s $180,000 per police officer added for those Metro school graduates averse to math.  Ask those cops how much they get paid a year and then ask where the other $135,000 went.

It seems Pravda On The Cumberland finally got a little competition.

Best not to examine all those Phantom Congressional Districts that got $54 Million in cream right off the top.  You say “Cream!” too loud around these inky apparatchiks and all they do is close their eyes and open their mouths.

$54 Million??? Why, that’s almost 300 new Robocops we could have bought or at least fended off lawsuits over rightfully arresting illegal aliens.  Or at least put a down payment on a light rail so we can have the illegals polishing the brass on our Shining Sanctuary City On The Hill.

Robocop: Only cost $73k in 1987 dollars (though most of his parts were made in Mexico)

Whatever you do Joey and the rest of your Comrades at the NCCCP, don’t look into that ghost money.  We’d all much rather read your incessant lacrimosas over Juana Villegas’ spilled breast milk.

Hold on to your Bose Wave Radio and leatherbound Paul Harvey transcripts. Fred Thompson’s planning on releasing his memoirs:

“Teaching the Pig to Dance” recounts the movie star-turned-politician’s 50s-era upbringing in Lawrenceburg, Tennessee.

The title alludes to what Thompson concedes were some of his own flaws and specifically how difficult he made it for those who were trying to help raise him.

“There is an old saying that teaching the pig to dance is a fruitless endeavor,” Thompson said in an e-mail. “It is a waste of your time and it irritates the pig. That was probably how my parents, teachers, coaches and townsfolk felt about me.”

And me with all these hoof prints on the top of my shoes.

Give it a week. He’ll abandon his writing and ask you to read McCain’s biography again.

Harold or Clayton???  I get these two so confused.

There are so many striking similarities.Quick, Prudence.  Tell Jasper to get the pick-up truck helicopter ready.  Brother Harold’s going to make white liberals in New York feel comfortable with him one egg-white garden omelet at a time.

Serial racebaiter Harold Ford Jr., of the notorious Ford Memphis Crime Family, gave a perplexing interview to some columnist named Marion Dowd of a paper named after her visage, the Old Grey Lesbian.  Enjoy how he remembers things the way they weren’t:

Ford said he and his pretty blond wife, Emily, a marketing expert, were married in 2008 after his racially charged run for the Senate in Tennessee. They have made her apartment their official home.

“My wife decided after the ’08 election,” he said. “There was so much bad racial stuff out of Tennessee on Obama. I’m in an interracial marriage. I don’t want to subject my wife to this, and I want to start a family. I think my marriage is more accepted here than it would be in Tennessee.

Then promise to never come back, asshole.

First off, race was never a factor in Ford’s losing effort to become a Senator.  If it was it was on his part.

Allow me to posit that there is a kernel of truth in his accusation about racism in Tennessee though.  If St. Alban’s little Lord Fauntleroy thought him marrying a “pretty blond wife” was going to lose him votes it was going to be from people on his own side.  Mainly, a fractured black vote against him for being a race traitor. All those black church ladies in Memphis might have a problem getting up to vote that morning if Harold’s son was sporting Pam Anderson on his arm every day.  Evidently they resent that kind of stuff.

He kept his fiancee in the closet so long that she needed the pedicures to remove the mold.  That’s not an indictment of Threlkeld’s hygiene as much as one of the fungus she’s attached herself.

Then Obama came along and the Clinton star that Ford attached himself to started to descend.  Apparently there were more palatable “light-skinned, clean and articulate” candidates out there who also were absent of that pesky negro dialect that some Nevada Senators find so objectionable.

The question New Yorkers must ask themselves is “Are they ready to elect Clayton Bigsby as their new representative?”

Sadly, a local icon passed away yesterday afternoon.  Doris Demos of the world-renowned, if not Mid-TN renowned, Demos’ restaurant chain died in Murfreesboro:

“She was the heart and soul of Demos’, and she made the heart and soul the way she did with her kids, which was with discipline of the staff — and she did it with 100 percent love,” he said.Peter explained that his mother had been in good health her entire life, but suffered a massive stroke Tuesday night that caused hemorrhaging next to her brain stem. She died on Wednesday afternoon.

I started going to Demos’ shortly after they opened when I attended MTSU.  Mrs. Demos was an omnipresent fixture.  Everything was always outstanding – the food, the staff – everything.  Especially the price.

One night, and this is my only Doris Demos story, I ordered a steak that might have been a little too rare and did not feel so well afterwards.  In what was sure to be a sign of things to come, I left a negative comment card on the table.

Bright and early the very next morning, I got a personal phone call from Mrs. Demos inviting me to come back and that she would take care of everything.  And she did.   That’s been over 15 years ago as much as it pains me to say and to this day I still go there for a bowl of baked chicken and rice soup whenever I start feel a cold coming on.

Godspeed, Mrs. D and condolences to the family.   You are already missed.

Yes, a belated hat tip to Yiddish and Nigel for not clubbing the Titans crowd to death with the yule log Vince Young laid in the home field stocking on Christmas night.

Class act, ya’ll.  With poise, you remained silent after the nationally televised, open-air colonoscopy Philip Rivers performed on the Titans’ secondary.  Thanks to the camera mounted on the tip of his foot, we have identified several polyps in need of removal during the suddenly present offseason.

Admittedly, my prediction would have been was 3-4 interceptions for Young but my fortune-telling abilities had been damaged during a freak turkey & dressing accident earlier in the day.  Little did I know that the biggest turkey was yet to come  as Young had only two interceptions and a forehead slapping fumble.  For the passes where he did sling on target, my dog’s veterinarian hasn’t seen that many balls dropped.  Instead of VY, we’ve got KY.  And every time he’s in use we’re gonna get screwed.

His accuracy as a passing QB makes me long to see Marty Feldman suit up.

Coach Jeff “Cold” Fisher can’t even muster a cheese spread knife of outrage as mistake after mistake compounded to 21 unanswered points topped off with a roughing the passer penalty against Rivers and a foul from the Titans bench after the play was over – all on the same play!

With the exception of a couple of our team members, the rest should serve as towelboys through the Chargers playoff run as they gratefully did not ramp up the score on them again like New England did.  So thanks again for not rubbing it in, guys.