Dear Buffet Friend,
I am corresponding this week from France. Why France, the land of Socialism, chic anti-Americanism and steadfast opposition to “Le Cowboy, Bush”?

Short answer, free airfare and distant cousins who live here. Also, waaaaay before I became conservative back in high school, I wanted very much to visit the place.

So, time and jet-lag permitting, I will correspond with you dear reader from the City of Light; Paris.

No, that was the first sign that the city was recovering.  As I watched the turd of his ascendancy, buoyed by the rising waters of the Cumberland River, as it floated towards the bowl of New Orleans – I couldn’t help but feel sorry for them

May 15th, 2010 “And This Little Piggy Went Wee, Wee, Wee All The Way Home”

What has happened (to New Orleans)recently???  I’m at a loss unless…wait…there was something that happened just this last week:

Nashville Police Chief Ronal Serpas takes job in New Orleans

Did the bouquet resemble fried bologna, Old Spice, jowl sweat and feet?  Because if it did, I think we’ve found our culprit.

For a city that prides itself on bacchanalian revelry, the stale sock of Chief Teetotaler is about to drape across the nose of your good time for the foreseeable future.

I’d say to prepare for the jump in violent crime and unsolved murders too (our’s is close to 40% now), but thanks to the Legacy of Naginomics you all should be ready to make that drunken, hobo stumble into Chicago gangland numbers.

Congratulations to your up and coming funeral home industry and may it replace all the French Quarter businesses forced to close once he starts enacting the same DUI laws that he did here.

Damn, it sucks to be so right.

New Orleans murder studies show rate is 10 times national average

Published: Saturday, March 26, 2011, 1:45 PM

Murder.

How prevalent is it? How do police stop it? What can be done?

The two analyses, the result of months-long studies conducted late last year by the federal government, attempt to shed light on the myriad factors that conspire to make New Orleans the nation’s most murderous city.

With reams of data and statistics, federal experts determined that New Orleans’ homicide rate is 10 times higher than the national rate and five times higher than the rate for comparably sized cities.

This is just for starters.  Serpas has only been there a year.  His solution is going to be to break out a computer and start feeding it garbage statistics to make you forget all those bodies you’ll be seeing on the news every night by putting a COMSTAT graphic on the Internet to make you think he’s doing something.  And prepare  for a full-scale assault by NOPD to bring the full, pedantic force of traffic law enforcement down on the heads of the citizenry scofflaws  to solve the murder problem.

It makes sense as Serpas was recently and curiously cleared of any wrongdoing in a scandal where the contract for reviewing traffic tickets was awarded to his best friend and a myriad of other double-dipping, doling out sweetcake off-duty police work assignment scandals that might sink the average bullshitter.

Indeed, NOLA.  It sucks to be you.  Flush Serpas now before he starts lulling you into a false sense of security by repeatedly defining rapes and sexual assaults  down to “Matters Of Record” like he did to juke the stats here.

Western forces pounded Libya’s air defences and patrolled its skies on Sunday, but their day-old intervention hit a serious diplomatic setback as the Arab League chief condemned the “bombardment of civilians.”

…

But Arab League chief Amr Moussa said what was happening was not what Arabs had envisaged when they called for the imposition of a no-fly zone over Libya.

“What is happening in Libya differs from the aim of imposing a no-fly zone, and what we want is the protection of civilians and not the bombardment of more civilians,” he said.

He said, “I want you to paint me a picture of Libya based on my specific directions for what I hope will happen and I will criticize and second-guess your every brushstroke but never, ever, ever pick up the brush to paint the picture myself.”

Your “broad coalition” just fell apart and has turned into an invasion by Western white people of another Muslim country for their oil interests.  And surprise, the US gets to be the knuckledragging henchman to do the heavy lifting and pick up the tab for French business interests.

The more you hear backstabbing heathens Arab leaders, the more you can appreciate the integrity of a shifting sand dune.

The House voted Thursday to dethrone nine White House “czars.”

Republicans successfully added an amendment to the continuing resolution that would leave President Barack Obama’s senior advisers on policy issues including health care, energy and others out of a job.

…

Rep. Steve Scalise (R-La.) offered the amendment that blocks funding for various policy advisers to combat what he called “a very disturbing proliferation of czars” under Obama.

“These unappointed, unaccountable people who are literally running a shadow government, heading up these little fiefdoms that nobody can really seem to identify where they are or what they’re doing,”

No more kings.  No more czars.  No more government funded cars.

The jobs on the chopping block: White House-appointed advisers on health care, energy and climate, green jobs, urban affairs, the closure of the Guantanamo Bay detention center, oversight of TARP executive compensation, diversity at the Federal Communications Commission and the auto industry manufacturing policy.

Communists and economic illiterates every one.  I know I give Republicans hell for being milquetoast, jelly-spined crapweasels but this is definitely a step in the right direction.

Now, on to overturning the oil moratorium before the Middle Eastern tinderbox explodes and oil skyrockets to $200 a barrel.

The jew-hating Ron De Paulle is already trying to spark a sequel to the Six Day War.

I’m going to question the timing:

NEW ORLEANS — At almost 300 years old, somewhat moldy from the remnants of Hurricane Katrina and surrounded by muddy water and swamps, this city is not exactly known for being lemony fresh.

…

But from the French Quarter to New Orleans East, people here have been complaining about a tinge to the air that is unsettling even by local standards.

What has happened recently???  I’m at a loss unless…wait…there was something that happened just this last week:

Nashville Police Chief Ronal Serpas takes job in New Orleans

Did the bouquet resemble fried bologna, Old Spice, jowl sweat and feet?  Because if it did, I think we’ve found our culprit.

For a city that prides itself on bacchanalian revelry, the stale sock of Chief Teetotaler is about to drape across the nose of your good time for the foreseeable future.

I’d say to prepare for the jump in violent crime and unsolved murders too (our’s is close to 40% now), but thanks to the Legacy of Naginomics you all should be ready to make that drunken, hobo stumble into Chicago gangland numbers.

Congratulations to your up and coming funeral home industry and may it replace all the French Quarter businesses forced to close once he starts enacting the same DUI laws that he did here.

NEW ORLEANS – A student at a Maurepas school was sent home by the principal for refusing to take off an Indianapolis Colts jersey, according to a statement from the American Civil Liberties Union.

“(T)he Principal of Maurepas High School, which had declared that students could wear jerseys in support of the New Orleans Saints, punished a student for wearing a jersey in support of the Indianapolis Colts,” said ACLU Executive Director Margie Esman in an e-mail.

“The student, who had lived most of his life in Indianapolis and has an outstanding academic record, was called out of class and told that he was not allowed to wear that shirt. When he refused to change his shirt, the principal sent him home.”

We’re just talking about one out-of-control, tinpot fascist here – right?  A rogue principal whose school spirit borders on North Korean nationalism.  But then you delve into the comments section and see how far some people are willing to go to support his actions.  Running the gamut from calling for permanent expulsion of the student, to veiled personal threats of the student because “they know who he is”, to calling for arresting his parents with a few “whodats” peppered inbetween.   Rules are rules!

Maurepas High Valedictorian, Lootie: Just following the rules!

It’s easy to think some people are engaging in a bit of pre-Super Bowl hyperbole but since most Saints fans can’t spell “hyperbole” I dismissed that out of hand.  They’ve expelled one of the brighter students at their school for engaging in a harmless bit of free expression because he didn’t read the DRESS CODE.  This criticism coming from people who couldn’t watch a weather forecast for an entire week warning them to get out of the way of a CAT-5 hurricane the size of Germany.

Dumbasses don’t follow rules.

Rule #1:  Big Hurricane = Move.

But seriously, folks – Go Colts!

And if by some miracle of animal sacrifice and voodoo magic New Orleans is able to win then the police will need to be on standby.

To prevent Houston from being burned to the ground.

On Thursday morning, the freshman Republican announced that he would lead a congressional delegation to Honduras on Friday ahead of the country’s Nov. 29 elections.

…

“While this administration has failed to act decisively in Afghanistan, it is has no problem cracking down on a democratic ally and one of the poorest nations in Latin America,” DeMint added. “Now, President Obama and Democrats’ blind support for this would-be dictator and friend of Hugo Chavez will prevent members of Congress from learning the truth first hand.”

Lurch McKetchup is trying to obstruct DeMint’s fact-finding mission to Honduras so that DeMint can be present for a Foreign Relations Committee vote where justice and competency are sure to lose to two more Obama comminees.

Typical for the guy who ran around undermining Bush abroad to our ostensible allies when he was making his case for the office in 2004 or who all sat idly by when Jim McDermott and David Bonior ran off to Baghdad on the eve of the invasion.  Or when Natasha Pelosivic rushed off to Syria to lick the boot heel of Baby Assad.

What’s good for the goose.

What’s the worst he can do after all they’ve done? Censure you on the floor?

Honduras is a friend of ours.  If Zelaya gets back in it won’t be anymore.  There would be a bloody crackdown on everyone who enforced their Constitution.  The judges would be thrown in jail.  The opposition killed.  Dissenting publications squelched.  And blood on Obama’s already filthy hands.

Do it, DeMint.  Shine the disinfecting sunlight of the truth on the tools of Venezuela in Washington.

You won’t find it in the headlines, so here it is:

Today the President of France called the United States “the greatest nation in the world.”

I hope you were sitting down for that. Yes, I said the President of France today called the United States “the greatest nation in the world.”

I can understand why the mainstream media is burying that lead. The MSM certainly doesn’t agree that we’re the greatest nation in the world and they must feel a certain betrayal when they hear a Frenchman say it.

But I think its stunning to hear those words, coming from any man who holds the office De Gaulle once held. It’s like an old long lost friend, with whom you haven’t spoken for years, suddenly calling out of the blue to renew your friendship.

Here’s the key quote, and don’t miss Sarkozy’s point. It reveals a man who understands the essence of conservative philosophy.

America did not tell the millions of men and women who came from every country in the world and who–with their hands, their intelligence and their heart–built the greatest nation in the world: “Come, and everything will be given to you.” She said: “Come, and the only limits to what you’ll be able to achieve will be your own courage and your own talent.” America embodies this extraordinary ability to grant each and every person a second chance.

Here, both the humblest and most illustrious citizens alike know that nothing is owed to them and that everything has to be earned. That’s what constitutes the moral value of America. America did not teach men the idea of freedom; she taught them how to practice it. And she fought for this freedom whenever she felt it to be threatened somewhere in the world. It was by watching America grow that men and women understood that freedom was possible.

What made America great was her ability to transform her own dream into hope for all mankind.

[emphasis added]

But I got teary-eyed reading these next words.

The men and women of my generation heard their parents talk about how in 1944, America returned to free Europe from the horrifying tyranny that threatened to enslave it.

Fathers took their sons to see the vast cemeteries where, under thousands of white crosses so far from home, thousands of young American soldiers lay who had fallen not to defend their own freedom but the freedom of all others, not to defend their own families, their own homeland, but to defend humanity as a whole.

Fathers took their sons to the beaches where the young men of America had so heroically landed. They read them the admirable letters of farewell that those 20-year-old soldiers had written to their families before the battle to tell them: “We don’t consider ourselves heroes. We want this war to be over. But however much dread we may feel, you can count on us.” Before they landed, Eisenhower told them: “The eyes of the world are upon you. The hopes and prayers of liberty-loving people everywhere march with you.”

And as they listened to their fathers, watched movies, read history books and the letters of soldiers who died on the beaches of Normandy and Provence, as they visited the cemeteries where the star-spangled banner flies, the children of my generation understood that these young Americans, 20 years old, were true heroes to whom they owed the fact that they were free people and not slaves. France will never forget the sacrifice of your children.

To those 20-year-old heroes who gave us everything, to the families of those who never returned, to the children who mourned fathers they barely got a chance to know, I want to express France’s eternal gratitude.

On behalf of my generation, which did not experience war but knows how much it owes to their courage and their sacrifice; on behalf of our children, who must never forget; to all the veterans who are here today and, notably the seven I had the honor to decorate yesterday evening, one of whom, Senator Inouye, belongs to your Congress, I want to express the deep, sincere gratitude of the French people. I want to tell you that whenever an American soldier falls somewhere in the world, I think of what the American army did for France. I think of them and I am sad, as one is sad to lose a member of one’s family.

That was a really nice thing to say, and he didn’t have to say it in the way he did. But I, as an American born in Europe, really appreciate Sarkozy’s words, which I believe are heartfelt.

The MSM doesn’t want you to know it, but not everybody hates America. And I think there’s reason to be hopeful as long as we have friends like Anders Fogh Rasmussen of Denmark, John Howard of Australia, Angela Merkel of Germany, and now Nicolas Sarkozy of France.

Read the whole speech here.

Here at Six Meat Buffet we’ve had a lot of fun hurling epithets at “The Filthy French,” but when the president of France turns out to be more patriotic than the spokesman for Budweiser, it’s time to recognize it and say Vive la France.

Cause: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End global box office $960,998,993.00.

Effect: Pirate attacks worldwide jumped 14 percent in the first nine months of 2007.

Cause: Ratatouille global box office to date $515,410,872.00

Effect:

Newspapers said Britain faced a rodent population explosion; the wet weather meant we would be inundated by the creatures.

That was before Ratatouille. Thanks to the latest Disney/Pixar’s digital animation studio box office hit, featuring a lovable French rodent, the reputation of the rat is undergoing a PR renaissance. Children are now desperate to get their hands on a pet rat.

Mickey Mouse was unavailable for comment. Coincidence? I think not.